RichM
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Not me 
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::Leader Board:: Ahnko Honu Takes The Lead Chapter 22!
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RichM
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hoosierhiver
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Open adoption they can. Closed adoption, the old fashioned kind, the records are sealed.
Pueo
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I was not even paying attention, I started doing work. My PoHo Skillz are slipping!
Pueo
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Pueo
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I got squirrel'd
There was something shiny in my classroom that distracted me for a while.
Congrats Mim!!
Pueo
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Manager Meeting in 5 mins. This one should be much better than last week's.
Mim
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Hahaha, he cant demand much. The man does not have money for a car much less to get here. He doesnt actually know where we live. And if he keeps a cell phone on long enough to call us, I would be shocked.
So I am not worried.
I just love that birthmom asked Levi about it and Levi calls me to see what I think and he got a whole mouthful of hell nos and not in a million years and over my dead bodies.
That being said, when she has reached an age and maturity (probably after 16 or even older) and she wants to meet him, fine by me. But her being used to regular and loving contact from her birthmom, it would hurt her to have a contact that would most likely abruptly end.
Callie is a very emotionally sensitive, but also emotionally intouch child, and she makes very mature and deep connections between the events in her life. She has no problem with her adoption, but she might have a problem being faced with the reality that is her birthdad. She has to be old enough to know he is what he is. He is slow, has some mental things too... so there is that. I will teach her to be loving, understanding, and tolerant and guarded. She is just too young for that right now.
Mim
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I am a HUGE advocate for open adoption if you can do it!
It has been AMAZING with birthmom. We are an extended family to her. People in her life she strives to make proud.
Birthdad... is a total mess.
Mim
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Not necessarily because he is slow, from a very rough neighborhood, and you have to be understanding about certain behaviors.
So... in a lot of ways he is well-meaning. He does not even realize he is being not-socially-acceptable.
Because in his mentally slow inner-city world, he is just fine.
But....
Yeah... he is... not something anybody needs in their life. Yet.
Sullen Youth has been Fb friends with his birthmom for several years. It's been OK.
Still don't know where his animosity to his mom (Mrs Pere) comes from.
Still don't know where his animosity to his mom (Mrs Pere) comes from.
hoosierhiver
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hoosierhiver
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I think there is a little bit of a power struggle between every young man and their mother. Hopefully he'll grow out of it.
Pueo
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So no other negative feedback from any clients - they have been asking around. Got one very enthusiastic positive from a client (and it was not the one who sent me the email the other day) so they are pretty much just going to say that it is an isolated incident and just not have me work with that particular client again.
Still bothers me though.
No idea why they would say that - I mean I cannot recall a specific incident.
Nanilei asked, "Was it a woman that complained?" and I said yes.
She said that I can be dismissive or make people (especially women) feel belittled or stupid. I really don't mean to, but apparently it happens to her sometimes still (and we've been together 23 years) and sometimes her sisters see it too.
I wish I could get a handle on that because I really have no intention of bruising anyone's feelings ever!
It has to do with correcting someone or explaining things - I think I am educating them, they feel I am calling them stupid or talking down to them.
I know it is a personality thing, because I have heard others say they love asking me about stuff because they learn things.
If I could read the other person better I could adjust my delivery.
Still bothers me though.
No idea why they would say that - I mean I cannot recall a specific incident.
Nanilei asked, "Was it a woman that complained?" and I said yes.
She said that I can be dismissive or make people (especially women) feel belittled or stupid. I really don't mean to, but apparently it happens to her sometimes still (and we've been together 23 years) and sometimes her sisters see it too.
I wish I could get a handle on that because I really have no intention of bruising anyone's feelings ever!
It has to do with correcting someone or explaining things - I think I am educating them, they feel I am calling them stupid or talking down to them.
I know it is a personality thing, because I have heard others say they love asking me about stuff because they learn things.
If I could read the other person better I could adjust my delivery.
Pueo
Well-known member
HAhaha yup.
Try growing up with a single mom who built her own extremely successful Escrow business from scratch in the man's world of Real Estate in the 70's and 80's.
I am still very proud of her, but man sometimes it was a struggle to have someone to relate to with no dad around, and my brother (8 years older) who moved out as soon as he could. I pulled some real CRAP I tell you.
Peace to you Père, and Mrs. Père, I hope it passes swiftly.
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