Yes, I've been bedeviled by the 2312 shape. Instead of forming F first, try starting with the two fingers on the second fret (1st and 4th strings), which puts your other two fingers more in position. The other suggestions above, 4310 and 4556, may also serve as good alternatives.
The biggest problem I have with the 2413 Fmaj7 (etc.) is remembering which finger goes where. It helps me to start by planting the index and middle fingers on the first two strings. Then I reach out over the fretboard with my other two fingers and replicate the same shape, just a fret higher. That's how I think of the shape, as a sort of skewed rhombus. Sometimes I can start with the F chord, then plant the other two fingers, but I tend to get this confused with F7 (2313), where the positions of the ring finger and pinkie are in essence reversed. If you can easily form the alternative F (2013), but using the ring finger on the 1st string, you just have to drop the pinkie on the 3rd string to form Fmaj7. Fmaj7 usually substitutes for F (i.e. F will fit, albeit not as colorfully, wherever Fmaj7 is needed), so if you're playing a strumming pattern, it may not matter if you're a little late with the pinkie. (The same can't be said when using the same shape higher up.) You can even pull up the pinkie occasionally, switching back and forth with F, to make things sound more intentional.
