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gion
12-04-2015, 06:08 PM
http://forum.ukuleleunderground.com/newthread.php?do=newthread&f=4

70sSanO
12-04-2015, 07:57 PM
for the...

kkimura
12-05-2015, 03:32 AM
new thread?

Jim Hanks
12-05-2015, 09:34 AM
said the man paying for his purchase at the fabric store. I had a rip in my...


(wait, we're not really doing this again are we? :nana:)

Down Up Dick
12-05-2015, 09:47 AM
shirt right where the arm goes through. There's one on the . . .

kvehe
12-05-2015, 10:26 AM
left side and another small one....

Peace Train
12-05-2015, 10:33 AM
on the right. Can I also get some chips with that (or must I go to another store)?

Down Up Dick
12-05-2015, 10:35 AM
and a big piece of cheese for my . . .

DownUpDave
12-05-2015, 10:50 AM
pet rat who performs in the circus playing.....

kvehe
12-05-2015, 10:53 AM
Five Foot Two and Ain't She Sweet, although he would much rather play music that is a bit more contemporary, such as

ukuleleden
12-05-2015, 11:02 AM
..purple rain and who let the dogs out, but only after warning up the crowd with the old time favorite of...

igorthebarbarian
12-05-2015, 11:29 AM
Camptown Ladies, which he learned as a soldier in ...

Down Up Dick
12-05-2015, 11:33 AM
a bar right outside the main gate at old Camp . . .

DaveY
12-05-2015, 11:50 AM
North Star, where a counselor named "Tripper" taught everyone . . .

joekulele
12-05-2015, 12:05 PM
how to triple strum using...

DaveY
12-05-2015, 12:15 PM
tongues -- their own, and two other people's -- while warning to be careful not to . . .

DownUpDave
12-05-2015, 02:24 PM
swap spit and make physical contact below the....

Down Up Dick
12-05-2015, 02:55 PM
chin (I'm old). So they played for a while until it was time to . . .

kvehe
12-05-2015, 03:05 PM
watch the SEC championship game, all the while thinking they'd rather be watching curling because

DaveY
12-05-2015, 04:04 PM
they needed a nap, but then they realized that . . .

ukuleleden
12-05-2015, 04:13 PM
...he needed to get back to practicing his claw hammer technique so he could further his pursuit of

DownUpDave
12-05-2015, 06:02 PM
Randomly thanking people for...

Peace Train
12-05-2015, 06:21 PM
no apparent reason. An overwhelming sense of gratitude filled him with...

Down Up Dick
12-05-2015, 06:39 PM
feelings of wellbeing, so he poured himself another . . .

igorthebarbarian
12-05-2015, 07:06 PM
Tall glass of whiskey. He proceeded to pass out, and awoke...

kvehe
12-05-2015, 07:11 PM
to find that a ukulele had been left at the foot of the bed. There was also a hard case, an Oasis humidifier, a Snark, and a strap. All he lacked was

ScooterD35
12-05-2015, 07:31 PM
an audience. So he headed on down to the local

Peace Train
12-05-2015, 08:22 PM
table tennis tournament. Unpacking his uke like a boss, that deaf, dumb, and blind kid sure....

mds725
12-05-2015, 10:25 PM
has too much time on his hands if he's posting in threads like ....

ukuleleden
12-06-2015, 12:43 AM
had the velocity of a well tuned soprano striking a high G while strummin' to his favorite...

hollisdwyer
12-06-2015, 01:10 AM
time signature. Which of course was....

kvehe
12-06-2015, 01:53 AM
19/16, which he learned from

Luke El U
12-06-2015, 01:54 AM
his nephew and 7/8 which he learned from his cousin in Bosnia who . . .

ukuleleden
12-06-2015, 03:02 AM
Is currently planning a speaking tour on the validity of online ukulele reviews, writing ability comparisons , and other diversions experienced in the pursuit of the joy of all things ukulele. Each seminar will offer free coffee, donuts, cookies and a meet and greet with a complimentary...

Booli
12-06-2015, 04:24 AM
brown paper lunch-bag of assorted, random strings, made from nylon, nylgut, fluorocarbon and...

Down Up Dick
12-06-2015, 04:56 AM
of course, cat gut. The cat people were very displeased about all the dead and mangled . . .

Booli
12-06-2015, 06:01 AM
bovines that were piled in the nearby ditch, but they were happy for the barbecue and milk to enjoy while they...

kvehe
12-06-2015, 06:05 AM
frolicked in a light rain shower, being very grateful that there was a covered patio nearby so the barbecue equipment and wonderful assortment of picnic foods were not ruined. After the rain stopped, everyone

Booli
12-06-2015, 06:27 AM
was so stuffed from all the awesome food, having eaten way too much, all took a nap, and several hours later were awoken by...

kvehe
12-06-2015, 07:18 AM
the hula maidens and Cpt. Spaulding from franky,b's 14 Oct 2015 thread. Cpt. Spaulding was in uniform, but the hula maidens were not wearing their usual attire; instead they were

UkieOkie
12-06-2015, 10:06 AM
...wearing full length tyvek clean suits because they had another job after the gig as CSI crime scene technicians at the scene of a...

Booli
12-06-2015, 12:07 PM
murder-suicide at the Tri-County Faire, right in front of the booth for...

joekulele
12-06-2015, 12:09 PM
Schoenhut ukuleles that were covered with...

Booli
12-06-2015, 12:16 PM
hundreds of cut marks made by a box cutter, and then were soaked with lighter fluid, getting ready for the annual 30ft tall 'Burning Uke' statue bonfire which was scheduled for MIDNIGHT under a full moon, while off in the distance...

Down Up Dick
12-06-2015, 01:14 PM
the skirlling of the pipes and the thumping of the drums could be heard for the . . .

joekulele
12-06-2015, 02:16 PM
...first annual Scottish Highlands Ukulele Festival, but the only problem was...

ukuleleden
12-06-2015, 02:39 PM
... A lack of kilts to go around to outfit the marching ukulele band, but the day was saved when

hollisdwyer
12-06-2015, 02:46 PM
the local hardware store donated a crate of authentic Scottish kilts woven in Bangladesh with spandex. Unfortunately....

jollyboy
12-06-2015, 03:23 PM
there was a shortage of talcum powder and the spandex kilts chafed horribly, especially during the caber tossing, leaving many tossers with a nasty rash under the sporran. However...

kvehe
12-06-2015, 07:01 PM
just when they thought they would go crazy due to the rashes, a troop of Girl Scouts appeared with many tubes of a healing cream. The girls were all working on the requirements for a first aid badge, and this was the final task on their list. Having cured the rashes, the Girl Scouts set up a table to sell cookies to the

ukuleleden
12-07-2015, 01:48 AM
Vast crowds that gathered to hear their favorite ukulele tunes being played by the large ensemble of players that had assembled. But things got even better for those in attendance when it was announced a surprise guest appearance by none other than the renowned...

Down Up Dick
12-07-2015, 03:57 AM
Tiny Tim Jr with his sparkling pink soprano ukulele. All hoped he would play . . .

jollyboy
12-07-2015, 04:26 AM
his medley of Slipknot hits, so that they could get a good mosh pit going and...

hollisdwyer
12-07-2015, 04:40 AM
flow into a wall of death but sanity prevailed. So instead they.....

Ukejenny
12-07-2015, 05:13 AM
...walked down to the local YMCA and signed up for a basket weaving class, so they could eventually...

Down Up Dick
12-07-2015, 09:10 AM
make woven ukulele mats for use in sitting under the swaying palm trees playing . . .

Booli
12-07-2015, 09:50 AM
'Flight Of the Bumblebee' at 320 beats per minute, but little did they realize that this song played at this tempo was in fact enharmonic with the standard bee 'waggle' communications and that a giant swarm of bees had been summoned by the song, so to prepare for the arrival of the 'friendly' bee swarm, they...

ukuleleden
12-07-2015, 10:11 AM
They used their newly acquired basket weaving skills and manufactured an impenetrable barrier that would keep the bees from getting in, while still allowing the music to flow out. Frustrated, the bees eventually left the area, replaced by hoards of screaming fans who demanded to hear more chorus' of

Booli
12-07-2015, 10:25 AM
Don McClean's 'Bye, Bye Miss American Pie, took the Chevy to the levy but the levy was dry...'

vanflynn
12-07-2015, 10:34 AM
played backwards but there was a looming thunder cloud approching so .......

Peace Train
12-07-2015, 11:34 AM
them good ole boys drinking whiskey and rye came to the rescue. Thank God for...

Booli
12-07-2015, 12:09 PM
saddle up a pack of wild boars and go riding off in search of some...

hollisdwyer
12-07-2015, 10:35 PM
Mango milkshakes even though it meant a 20 mile wild boar ride through....

Booli
12-08-2015, 01:38 AM
thickets and brambles which stuck to their clothing, and the little needles left scrapes any any exposed skin, so when they completed the 20 mile trek for the Mango Milkshakes, they had to...

ukuleleden
12-08-2015, 02:00 AM
Stop into a roadside first-aid facility that provided basic medical care on one side of the building, while the trail wary boar riders quickly found out the other side of the building operated as a

kvehe
12-08-2015, 02:55 AM
combined outlet store for HMS, Mim, Uke Republic, and Mainland. It was always such a treat to go there and

Down Up Dick
12-08-2015, 03:38 AM
plunk on the various ukuleles and warble the good ol' tunes like . . .

VegasGeorge
12-08-2015, 04:01 AM
"And the Band Played Waltzing Matila" which they were into rather well by the time the parishioners from the local

hollisdwyer
12-08-2015, 05:08 AM
church of the Holy Pinball Wizard strolled by. They were so entranced, instead of .....

jollyboy
12-08-2015, 05:29 AM
flipping their little balls (as was their sacred creed) they all sat down cross-legged on the floor and began to chant the chorus to...

Down Up Dick
12-08-2015, 07:40 AM
"Take Me Out To The Ballgame!" and feasted on Dodger Dogs and . . .

Peace Train
12-08-2015, 12:01 PM
copious amounts of koa, spruce, and rosewood sounds. And it wasn't long before someone had the bright idea to...

VegasGeorge
12-08-2015, 04:21 PM
bus the whole lot of them down to the local bowling alley, where Lulu and the Leaping Lizards were staging

hollisdwyer
12-08-2015, 05:15 PM
a musical version of the "Never Ending Story" where the orchestra was comprised entirely of.....

kvehe
12-08-2015, 05:27 PM
ocarinas, concert flutes, wooden kazoos, and Hive ukuleles. The soloist was

ukuleleden
12-08-2015, 05:28 PM
Willie Nelson who performed his famous song...

Peace Train
12-08-2015, 08:54 PM
Always On My Mind. There wasn't a dry eye in sight by the time all was said and done. Not because the show was moving, which it most definitely was, but because the sprinkler system was set off by...

jollyboy
12-09-2015, 03:13 AM
Captain Spaulding's cigar smoke. Everyone was a little annoyed with the Captain, but he ran off after an elephant in his pajamas* before anyone could properly give him a piece of their mind. After that, it was decided that it would be best just to...




*How the elephant got into the Captain's pajamas no one could really say.

Down Up Dick
12-09-2015, 04:25 AM
dry off and go in search of some good, tasty . . .

UkieOkie
12-09-2015, 04:34 AM
...blues music. But if you were wanting so we actual food look out for the...

Booli
12-09-2015, 06:50 AM
Aloha Joe Lunch Truck, which had been serving the area for at least a decade and usually shows up right on time, so everyone was craving their favorite menu items, which includes...

ukuleleden
12-09-2015, 06:54 AM
Free ukulele tabs with every appetizer, meal or beverage. In lieu of payment, customers can instead work off their bill by...

UkieOkie
12-09-2015, 07:53 AM
...by joining the Ukulele Robin Hoods, a group of Uke psuedo-criminals and a branch off of the Ukukele mafia who steal unplayed and...

Croaky Keith
12-09-2015, 09:35 AM
.....long neck soprano......

Down Up Dick
12-10-2015, 04:29 PM
strings to sell to those who are wildly opting for the latest fad--long neck . . .

kvehe
12-10-2015, 04:37 PM
mini jumbo baritone guilele tenor guitar euphoniums, which are the special signature instrument of

ukuleleden
12-11-2015, 04:10 PM
the official online ukulele reviewers society who next year will mark their milestone of

vanflynn
12-11-2015, 04:57 PM
the friction tuner -vs- gear tuner debate. They will also introduce a new type of strings made entirely from

Peace Train
12-31-2017, 02:05 PM
Palladium; the perfect string to revive a dormant thread and ring in 2018. As midnight struck, everyone raised a glass to toast the year ahead...


Happy New Year Everyone!!!!!!!

LarryS
01-01-2018, 03:00 AM
Hoping that 2018 brings everyone all that they

Down Up Dick
01-01-2018, 03:44 AM
desire but don’t really need except to keep in their

LarryS
01-01-2018, 04:12 AM
wildest dreams, which are often dark and

Croaky Keith
01-01-2018, 05:07 AM
...full of those six string monsters, which.....

bratsche
01-01-2018, 12:50 PM
...trigger powerful flashbacks to wild times from their misspent youth, when they would...

MopMan
01-01-2018, 01:02 PM
...struggle to fret a satisfactory barre F chord. It's a good thing...

LarryS
01-07-2018, 10:50 PM
the f chord is much easier

bariukish
01-08-2018, 06:11 AM
than fretting a b flat 7th dim chord while playing the Russian Sabre Dance at 167 bpm and...

Down Up Dick
01-09-2018, 05:52 AM
sipping a Vodka shot held by a

Nickie
01-09-2018, 12:50 PM
...Parkinsonism patient....

70sSanO
01-09-2018, 01:28 PM
...while trying to re-string a...

LarryS
01-14-2018, 10:01 PM
period archlute