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MGM
05-04-2009, 07:12 AM
How do you get it thru to someone that if they left the ukulele on a sofa and someone sat on it that warranty will not replace it....I dumbfounded that the customer expects a replacement or repair under warranty LOL

dominicfoundthemooon
05-04-2009, 07:15 AM
How do you get it thru to someone that if they left the ukulele on a sofa and someone sat on it that warranty will not replace it....I dumbfounded that the customer expects a replacement or repair under warranty LOL

well did the ukulele resemble a pillow.. was it a pillow uke.. because if it was.. then YOU ARE AT FAULT.. so stop making those.. it mixes people up!

sukie
05-04-2009, 07:19 AM
How do you get it thru to someone that if they left the ukulele on a sofa and someone sat on it that warranty will not replace it....I dumbfounded that the customer expects a replacement or repair under warranty LOL


It doesn't? Good to know. :D

By the way -- it wasn't me.

Honu
05-04-2009, 07:21 AM
I'm quite dissapointed that your warranty does not cover a$$ damage. Us heftier guys might have an issue with this. Must remember that when purchasing.:rolleyes:

Kanaka916
05-04-2009, 07:22 AM
Eh Mike, try reply in pidgin and see what happens! Nah, bad idea - just might confuse the buggah mo.

generem
05-04-2009, 07:33 AM
Mike!!!!

I cant believe you posted this... You Promised!!!

And to clarify, I didnt sit on her. It was during heavy love making.. She was so beautiful that I couldnt help myself.. One thing lead to another then crack!!

J..K.. :rotfl:

Out of Curiosity, What kind of an ukulele was it?

Honu
05-04-2009, 08:05 AM
Out of Curiosity, What kind of an ukulele was it?

Would the type of Uke have affected the type of "Love Making" that was metioned before?:D

Ahnko Honu
05-04-2009, 08:13 AM
How do you get it thru to someone that if they left the ukulele on a sofa and someone sat on it that warranty will not replace it....I dumbfounded that the customer expects a replacement or repair under warranty LOL

Was it a Sears Craftsman 'ukulele?

Myala509
05-04-2009, 08:21 AM
:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

pebbleInDaPacific
05-04-2009, 08:43 AM
hey Mike,

he probably think he could do it huh? he looked at your 100% feedback and said, "oh, he'll do it, he 100%!". Just send him some duct tape.

Captain Google
05-04-2009, 09:33 AM
Eh Mike, try reply in pidgin and see what happens! Nah, bad idea - just might confuse the buggah mo.

That makes it a good idea. If the guy can't understand it, that's his own problem. Heck, I can understand pidgin.

cpatch
05-04-2009, 09:38 AM
How do you get it thru to someone that if they left the ukulele on a sofa and someone sat on it that warranty will not replace it
Explain that the idea is a$$inine.

glp
05-04-2009, 09:42 AM
If the neck is fine just send them a cigar box.

russ_buss
05-04-2009, 09:46 AM
that's some pretty silly stuff. maybe he needs ass insurance if this kind of thing happens a lot. geico?

hoosierhiver
05-04-2009, 10:08 AM
I know your pain.

ukeatan
05-04-2009, 10:38 AM
This just goes to show, even if your ukuleles have the best warranty around, you still have to cover your ass. What?

bbycrts
05-04-2009, 12:21 PM
I feel sorry for the poor guy. If it happened to me, well - that would be a catA$$trophe.

Captain Google
05-04-2009, 12:44 PM
I feel sorry for the poor guy. If it happened to me, well - that would be a catA$$trophe.

I should have A$$umed this thread would turn into such a punny thing.

Link
05-04-2009, 12:49 PM
Tell him to sit on it and rotate!

ZING

Harold O.
05-04-2009, 12:52 PM
Tell him that Helen Waite is in charge of the sat-upon ukulele department.

He needs to go to Helen Waite.

ukuleletim
05-04-2009, 01:15 PM
He's gonna have to go to the rear of the warranty line, butt ya know...

This really cracks me up, butt I'm sure the end is near. (make me stop)

Well, I just so happened to sit on my Republic reso uke last night and it is still the same dimensions as when I got it. (Not that I recommend trying that.)

cpatch
05-04-2009, 01:19 PM
And of course you could always tell him not to be such a tight-a$$!

bt93
05-04-2009, 01:20 PM
im just waiting for deach to make a comment on this:nana:

Ahnko Honu
05-04-2009, 01:45 PM
This sounds like a preventable dis-a$$ed-her to me.

Craig
05-04-2009, 01:57 PM
How do you get it thru to someone that if they left the ukulele on a sofa and someone sat on it that warranty will not replace it....I dumbfounded that the customer expects a replacement or repair under warranty LOL
I guess they didn't read the "Big Ass" clause in the contract....

cpatch
05-04-2009, 01:58 PM
Whatever you do, be a$$ertive.

Uke-lahoma
05-04-2009, 01:58 PM
MGM,

It's been raining here in Oklahoma for a week now. Can I return my ukes for an exchange if I use them as boat paddles? (Perhaps only if they're boat paddle ukuleles.)

DeG
05-04-2009, 03:03 PM
Hey, the guy is just trying to protect (where) his assets :D

Captain Google
05-04-2009, 03:07 PM
I must say, those sittin' ukes get a bum rap.

tryan
05-04-2009, 03:13 PM
it seems to me to be a shameful example of sound hole on sound hole violence.

this aggression will not stand! (um...because it sits.)

Captain Google
05-04-2009, 03:39 PM
I had a really good pun in my arse-nal, butt it passed.

hoosierhiver
05-04-2009, 03:39 PM
Seems like a case of Huge A**umption.

Link
05-04-2009, 03:45 PM
Ass.


I DONT THINK IM DOIN IT RIGHT

cpatch
05-04-2009, 04:09 PM
As for the guy who sat on the uke, I'll bet it's the one time in his life he wished he had been a wisea$$!

DeG
05-04-2009, 04:10 PM
Ass.


I DONT THINK IM DOIN IT RIGHT

:rotfl: Practice makes perfect!!

kailua
05-05-2009, 02:48 AM
I'm new to the uke and still learning. Is what this guy did a form of chunking? Ah, butt chunking? Or a form of muting? Fanny muting? :confused: You guys are being really hard on this guy. He could be a UU member. If he's been reading this I'm sure he's em-bare-ASSed. :biglaugh: Chord bending? :confused:

sukie
05-05-2009, 03:09 AM
It's more like friendly teasing. Seriously though -- you sit on your ukulele and think that's covered by warranty?:rotfl:

MGM
05-05-2009, 08:20 AM
Thanks for the laughs Now I feel much better.....

Honu
05-05-2009, 10:11 AM
now that MGM has calmed us all down... can't we all think of a way to
A$$-ist our fellow Uker? :p

cpatch
05-05-2009, 10:21 AM
now that MGM has calmed us all down... can't we all think of a way to
A$$-ist our fellow Uker? :p
Put up a sign near the couch that says: "Don't Be A Bada$$"

rossjr
05-05-2009, 10:24 AM
OK, this isn't so funny and no it isn't me, I didn't sit on my, yet....

Regarding warranty and humiditiy damage, in this case lack of moisture. I live in the frozen tundra of Minnesota and the winters here can be brutal to a solid wood instrument. I have a beautiful Mango Tenor that cracked the first winter it spent here, right from the bridge to the bottom of the face, with the grain. I used a cord humidifier, I also have a whole house humidifier and a case humidifier. So it possible that in this case that it is a materal issue???

For the record the manufacturer is repairing it at no charge other than shipping.....

cpatch
05-05-2009, 10:33 AM
Regarding warranty and humiditiy damage, in this case lack of moisture. I live in the frozen tundra of Minnesota and the winters here can be brutal to a solid wood instrument. I have a beautiful Mango Tenor that cracked the first winter it spent here, right from the bridge to the bottom of the face, with the grain. I used a cord humidifier, I also have a whole house humidifier and a case humidifier. So it possible that in this case that it is a materal issue???
Unfortunately there's no way to know if the precautions you took were enough unless you had a digital hygrometer in the case to keep track of the actual humidity. It's entirely possible that even with the cord humidifier and the case humidifier the humidity was still too low. (Temperature and temperature changes play into the scenario as well.)


For the record the manufacturer is repairing it at no charge other than shipping.....
You can't ask for more than that.

Ahnko Honu
05-05-2009, 10:36 AM
Last time I was at Tangi's a kid came in and asked Tangi if he could fix his 'ukulele. When Tangi opened the case all that was there was kindling, a neck, and head of a once Koa 'ukulele. His kis brother had sat on it! Tangi said it would be much cheaper to buy a new one but the kid said it had sentimental value since it was a gift from his mom. He then asked Tangi if he could make him a new 'ukulele using that existing neck & head. Of course by now Tangi had stopped all ukulele production. Real funky attachment of neck to body too, just 2 wood screws and a square of 1/4" plywood block inside, no dovetail, not Spanish style with sides fitted into neck, just glue and 2 screws, kind of half-fast luthiery in my opinion. :rolleyes:

MGM
05-05-2009, 10:48 AM
In regards to cracking and humidity. this is the MOST grey area in warranty Actually most manufactrurers will not cover cracking since it is so hard to document proper care. Keeping a uke in proper enviroment 99% of the time then going to a place and playing in cold 10% humidity for a night and then taking it back into a warm house at 50% RH can cause cracking as well as leaving it in your car or trunk in a hot day....who is to say what actually starts cracking?? Was it the maker? was it the person... was it just the region you live?...yes one must consider where they live and climates when purchasing fragile finicky wood instruments....You could always build a uke like a tank and they will never crack but also sound like a uke with you still sitting on it..LOL It is so hard to determine the true nature of the cause...most must trust the truthful nature of the buyer as well as the circumstances of where the uke is and how it is cared for....Just look at the worlkds best ukuleles in terms of collectability and value and most of the old ones have developed some sort of crack...In fact some of the best sounding ukuleles are those with tops that sit on a fine line of too thin and apt to deform or depress but the sound Ahhhhh the sound is there....wood is wood and no matter what is done to try and prepare for seasoning before making the uke sometimes things happens.

MGM
05-05-2009, 10:51 AM
OH and as a added comment to the neck attaqchments. very few ukes have dovetails or spanish style necks Almost all ukuleles have a plain old butt joint glued attachment with a neck block inside the body...

Preston
05-05-2009, 10:55 AM
Mike, Just be glad that it wasn't me. You would have to replace the couch too.

rossjr
05-05-2009, 10:56 AM
I am very happy the manufacturer is working with me on this, and understand the issues of taking it in and out of the weather we live in here. Guess it's the price you pay sometimes. Since it is currently in for repairs, I will gladly sing thier praises when I get it back!

Ahnko Honu
05-05-2009, 11:08 AM
OH and as a added comment to the neck attaqchments. very few ukes have dovetails or spanish style necks Almost all ukuleles have a plain old butt joint glued attachment with a neck block inside the body...

WOW, I did not know that. None of my 'ukulele have any screws exposed even inside the body. This kid's 'ukulele the plywood block wasn't even square, and it was cheap D-fir plywood with rough saw cut unsanded edges, and the screws were flathead screws that were nor flush with the surface of block nor were they evenly spaced, it looked real "Mickey Mouse" to both me and Tangi, we just looked at each other and smiled when we saw that. This definitely looked half-fast. Maybe it was an earlier repair job?

Ahnko Honu
05-05-2009, 11:10 AM
Just out of curiosity I'd like to know what methods of neck connections each luthier uses, and why. I wonder if the method effects the sound. I guess this subject better posted in the luthier's forum section.

cpatch
05-05-2009, 12:28 PM
OH and as a added comment to the neck attaqchments. very few ukes have dovetails or spanish style necks Almost all ukuleles have a plain old butt joint glued attachment with a neck block inside the body...
Are you sure? I know Kanile`a and Kamaka use slotted splines (unless you're counting those as butt joints) and I'm pretty sure Ko`olau (and Pono) uses dovetail.

mailman
05-05-2009, 12:40 PM
The builder of the soprano I just bought uses a dovetail.

MGM
05-05-2009, 01:26 PM
well you guys need to do your homework a little better on neck joints i would say 95% off all ukuleles in the world is straight butt joint...try taking them apart and you will see....

ukeatan
05-05-2009, 01:34 PM
well you guys need to do your homework a little better on neck joints i would say 95% off all ukuleles in the world is straight butt joint...try taking them apart and you will see....

MGM, don't leave us hanging like that! We're not gonna run home and take apart our Koalohas and Kanileas :p

Do you know which if any major production ukes don't use a straight butt joint?

kailua
05-05-2009, 01:37 PM
What's a Butt Joint? :confused: Are we still talking about the guy that sat on his uke? Or is this the place on Kuhio Avenue in Waikiki? :confused: :anyone:

cpatch
05-05-2009, 01:43 PM
well you guys need to do your homework a little better on neck joints i would say 95% off all ukuleles in the world is straight butt joint...try taking them apart and you will see....
That may well be true, given that 95% of all ukuleles in the world are probably cheap, factory-made souvenirs.

cpatch
05-05-2009, 01:45 PM
What's a Butt Joint? :confused:
http://woodworking.about.com/od/joinery/p/buttJoints.htm

Ahnko Honu
05-05-2009, 01:54 PM
well you guys need to do your homework a little better on neck joints i would say 95% off all ukuleles in the world is straight butt joint...try taking them apart and you will see....

Are you saying Ko'olau, Kanile'a, KoAloha, and Kamaka use a straight butt joint neck to body? I own none of these ukuleles so this would be interesting to know for a fact. I don't really care how the mass produced Chinese 'ukulele are made.

cpatch
05-05-2009, 02:15 PM
Are you saying Ko'olau, Kanile'a, KoAloha, and Kamaka use a straight butt joint neck to body? I own none of these ukuleles so this would be interesting to know for a fact.
I know for a fact that Kanile`a and Kamaka use slotted splines. (Watch the Kanile`a factory tour on YouTube and check out this photo of a Kamaka during the build process: http://www.frets.com/FRETSPAGES/Features/Kamaka/KamakaViews/kamaka28.jpg)

Link
05-05-2009, 02:15 PM
...ASS!

Am I getting better at it?

DeG
05-05-2009, 02:22 PM
...ASS!

Am I getting better at it?

Almost there....:D

MGM
05-05-2009, 03:01 PM
why worry about..... neck seperation is one of the LEAST comman failures in a ukulele...there is not enough tension from the strings to make it a major factor on type of joinery used For sound transmission some say there is a difference in say a butt vs Spanish but even that can be debated...even some chinese ukes ..ie the Kala ka st has a spanish heel if you are getting the right models and some mangos also...can i really tell if I am playing a butt vs the spanish heel model...no Can I use it as a selling point? probably

Problems in order of magnitude.... to me

Buzzing
electronics failures
Action too High..... too low
Intonation off
finish issues
cracking
bridge came off
tuners rattle
end jack loose
warping
bridge failures ie tie point snaps off
pins dont hold
tuner peg malfunctions
NECK SEPERATION
PERSON SAT ON UKE

UkuleleD
05-05-2009, 03:05 PM
LMFAO like the last one :D

Ahnko Honu
05-05-2009, 03:39 PM
why worry about..... neck seperation is one of the LEAST comman failures in a ukulele...

For me anyways it's not a worry at all, it's a curiosity. I'm a woodworker both hobby and work, and a builder by trade, building anything from homes and ship piers all the way down to jewelry boxes, and cabinets. I turn wood calabashes, and I have also built several boats so I am always interested in the methods and techniques of way things are made or done. I plan on one day making my own ukuleles and would like to broaden my knowledge base that's all. ;) Would be nice to know how local luthiers construct their 'ukuleles including neck attachment methods, sound board bracing, etc. Many luthiers consider the Spanish method the best and I know R&L use this method, and it's the best sound 'ukulele I own though not the best method for mass production efficiency. :cool:

Captain Google
05-05-2009, 05:46 PM
All I can say is this: I would totally buy an Uncle Turtle ukulele.

cpatch
05-05-2009, 08:17 PM
All I can say is this: I would totally buy an Uncle Turtle ukulele.
I'm in. .

Ukuleleblues
05-06-2009, 02:19 AM
How did you keep a straight face when talking to this person?

I once saw a warning on a plastic storage box saying is wasnt for carring babies in it. (I was about to put three babies in it and saw it at the last moment thank god for warning labels) Maybe you need to put warning stickers all over the ukes you sell:

1. One of a big ass sitting on a uke with a circle and slash over it would be a good start.
2. A car running over a uke, with the message NOT TO BE USED AS WHEEL CHOCK
3. NOT FOR HUMAN CONSUMPTION is a must.
4. NOT DISWAHER SAFE.
5. Can Be addictive
6. for sure: MAY CAUSE UAS

deach
05-06-2009, 02:21 AM
http://fesmoving.vn/index_files/silica_gel.jpg

Lanark
05-06-2009, 02:33 AM
http://fesmoving.vn/index_files/silica_gel.jpg

mmmm....silica gel...

Captain Google
05-06-2009, 04:03 AM
http://fesmoving.vn/index_files/silica_gel.jpg

Mmmm... White X on red background which is now silica gel...

bbycrts
05-06-2009, 05:16 AM
All I can say is this: I would totally buy an Uncle Turtle ukulele.

I'm in, too. As long as it's not a pineapple (slim chance of that, I know). I think Ahnko got all of my love for the pineapple - because I gots none!