cpatch's 1000th post "is it spam?" contest

cpatch

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Well, for better or for worse, this marks my 1000th post on UU and to celebrate I'm sponsoring UU's first "Is it Spam?" contest. The rules are pretty simple and you don't need a video or any particular talent to enter. Just reply to this thread with a post that is at least vaguely related to the previous post but which also goes off on somewhat of a tangent that may or may not be considered spam. (In honor of my habit of doing the same.) If you can understand the last sentence you pretty much qualify to enter.

Try to stay ukulele-related as much as possible (or bring it back to ukes if previous posts have wandered.) For the sake of this contest "spam" is defined simply as an unsolicited response. Take that to mean whatever you want but keep it PG rated.

The contest ends on July 4th (or as soon after July 4th as I have a chance to pick a winner) and the winner, selected at random from those who posted, will receive a can of Spam wrapped in a UU t-shirt of their choice. (The runner-up receives two cans of Spam. Just kidding.)

Have fun!
 
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This is a great contest!!!

Almost as cool as that "Devil made me Do it" Contest that JT guy is hosting!

anyone see that one?

JT

Congrates on your 1000th Post.
JT I wanted to enter your contest but I'm scared of the Occult:eek:.
JT for some reason your bank has sent me your password, please click one the link below to reset it.

itsaripoff@oneborneveryminute.co.uk
 
Congrates on your 1000th Post.
JT I wanted to enter your contest but I'm scared of the Occult:eek:.
JT for some reason your bank has sent me your password, please click one the link below to reset it.

itsaripoff@oneborneveryminute.co.uk

Your bank password is invalid! Unauthorized access has been made to your account. You can receive a refund of the amount if you respond immediately to the link below with the following information:

What color of car do you drive?
How many days a week do you clip your toenails?
Concerning fresher breath do you prefer mints or gum?
Do you own more than three pairs of underpants?

Respond To:

pb4ugo2bed@imajackass.com
 
Congratulations on your 1000th post Cpatch! I just hit 50 posts myself. I was going to enter JT's contest but I do not yet have the skill to pull off "Friend of the Devil" yet, besides a lot of people have already covered that tune. I work for a bank, well actually a credit union, and I wanted to share with you all an amazing opportunity that was just emailed to me. It seems as though a Nigerian prince has 1000 vintage Kamaka and Martin ukuleles that are in danger of cracking due to the dry Nigerian climate and he is looking for someone in the US who will take good care of them. All you have to do is send him $5000 to pay for shipping them to your house, and he will let you keep them for free! Your kind curtsey in advancing is graet appreciate!
 
Congratulations on your 1000th post Cpatch! I just hit 50 posts myself. I was going to enter JT's contest but I do not yet have the skill to pull off "Friend of the Devil" yet, besides a lot of people have already covered that tune. I work for a bank, well actually a credit union, and I wanted to share with you all an amazing opportunity that was just emailed to me. It seems as though a Nigerian prince has 1000 vintage Kamaka and Martin ukuleles that are in danger of cracking due to the dry Nigerian climate and he is looking for someone in the US who will take good care of them. All you have to do is send him $5000 to pay for shipping them to your house, and he will let you keep them for free! Your kind curtsey in advancing is graet appreciate!

Don't believe the Nigerian Prince scam! In fact, I can help you get into a career investigating Nigerian Princes - work just three hours a month from home and you'll be making $10,000 in your first week! Email me at:

NoMoreNigerianPrinces@itsallascam.com
 
I've updated the rules to indicate that you should try to stay ukulele-related as much as possible (or bring the topic back to ukuleles if the post before yours wanders). The spam part is meant to have more to do with drifting off the previous topic than with email-related spam. All posts still count though.
 
Thanks for the clarification on the rules. Speaking of rules....are there any rules regarding the proper order in which to purchase ukuleles? Is it by size? By cost? By material? Just wondering.....
 
I've updated the rules to indicate that you should try to stay ukulele-related as much as possible (or bring the topic back to ukuleles if the post before yours wanders). The spam part is meant to have more to do with drifting off the previous topic than with email-related spam. All posts still count though.

I hope I win, because I've been wanting to build a Spam-Can ukulele for quite some time. (After all, cigarbox ukes are SO 20th century.) I think that the Spam-can uke would probably be a soprano, unless the prize is a family-size can of Spam. The project would even include its own tasty snack to have while working on the uke.
 
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I hope I win, because I've been wanting to build a Spam-Can ukulele for quite some time. (After all, cigarbox ukes are SO 20th century.) I think that the Spam-can uke would probably be a soprano, unless the prize is a family-size can of Spam. The project would even include its own tasty snack to have while working on the uke.

One can argue whether spam qualifies as a "tasty" snack. I wonder how many hours you'd have to play the uke to burn off the calories in a serving of spam?
 
I hope I win, because I've been wanting to build a Spam-Can ukulele for quite some time. (After all, cigarbox ukes are SO 20th century.) I think that the Spam-can uke would probably be a soprano, unless the prize is a family-size can of Spam. The project would even include its own tasty snack to have while working on the uke.

Would be a nice Uke! :shaka:
 
I know this isnt uke related spam but why does the rofl smiley look like Dracula?

On to some uke related spam, when I think of dracula it makes me wanna hear someone play monstermash on the uke. :D

Hmm I don't think it looks so much like dracula :p
When he is facing directly towards me i think it looks a bit like Seeso with mowhawk :shaka:
 
In case anyone's interested here are the chords to "I Wanna Get a Mohawk" by AFI. I'll have to give it a try to see how it's going to sound on the uke.

i was walking around huntington beach with my UKULELE on my back.. and it seems to get a lot of attention.. and by alot.. like 3 people talk to me about it.. out of 1000000 so yeah.. but still that is 3... on the topic of hair.. MOHAWKS.. i was looking at myself in this mirror when i was trying on a hat.. and i noticed i am thinning up front (sorry alan i know i dont have it like you) but i am FREAKING OUT!! i have been told i have to stop putting hats on my head.. and i just got a new hat.. as you have seen in my videos.. i love hats.. love them.. but yeah.. now i have to stop putting them on my head.. OUCH.. i just hot a new one.. so i do not know what to do.. my hair is super long.. so i think it looks more bald.. i pull it back.. so you can kind of see that area.. and if i had it cut all shaggy.. it would most likely fall forward over said area.. ummm yeah.. is this a rant... does this work? can i get people to look at my ukulele and not my balding head... bring it all back to the uke!

there i am in!
 
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Having problems with the size of your Uke? Do you have a soprano and want a Tenor? Everyone knows that tenors get the respect!

Now with the new Uke-Can-Stretch:
ukulele-stand.jpg

YOU CAN ADD 2"-5" in just 3 weeks!

Order yours today for 4 easy payments of just $9.99 plush S/H!

*Shipping and Handling cost may vary by state but will be no less than $75. Once the first payment is made no refunds can be issued.
**Item will be sent upon receiving first payment.
***No refunds or exchanges unless requested before first payment is received.

hahaha hillarious
I think that my soprano may use some stretching!
 
Having problems with the size of your Uke? Do you have a soprano and want a Tenor? Everyone knows that tenors get the respect!

Now with the new Uke-Can-Stretch:
ukulele-stand.jpg

YOU CAN ADD 2"-5" in just 3 weeks!

Order yours today for 4 easy payments of just $9.99 plush S/H!

*Shipping and Handling cost may vary by state but will be no less than $75. Once the first payment is made no refunds can be issued.
**Item will be sent upon receiving first payment.
***No refunds or exchanges unless requested before first payment is received.

Does it make the body, you know, BIGGER?

If not I have what you need.

Do you find the body of you uke giving you less then steller volume? With my method I can increase your ukes body but 2-3 %* (Garunteed**) Everyone know BIGGER is BETTER!!! Call me and We can Do business.

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