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raecarter
10-23-2010, 04:24 AM
I'm wondering if uas can mutate to different types of the disease? I recently bought a misi acoustic trio for my mainland and previous to that i had no desire to own an acoustic amp. Since the misi has arrived i have vegan hankering after one of these amps. Yesterday was my birthday and I have just spent a lot of money on a marshall as50d acoustic amp! What type of uas" do I have?

joeybug
10-23-2010, 04:39 AM
AAS? Amp Acquisition Syndrome?

Happy Birthday for yesterday :D

Lori
10-23-2010, 04:45 AM
That AAS (Amp Acquisition Syndrome)is usually seen in those who suffer from GAS (Guitar Acquisition Syndrome) or BAS (Bass Acquisition Syndrome), but it is pretty strong variant. My husband just got over a flare-up of AAS, by buying 2 small amps for his guitar. He was looking to buy just one small portable amp, but he couldn't decide which one he liked best, so he got two. Curse those Guitar Center people... "go ahead, take them both home and try them for 30 days, and return the one you didn't choose". Ha! They know what they're doing. So he has one electric guitar and 4 amps now (like I said, it was a flare-up of a previous condition).

UAS can also migrate to CAS (Case Acquisition Syndrome), SAS (String Acquisition Syndrome), and MBAS (Music Book Acquisition Syndrome). I am sure there are a few more...

–Lori

cletus
10-23-2010, 05:01 AM
recently i have vegan hankering

Do you crave a gourd ukulele?

AzMichael
10-23-2010, 05:41 AM
Watch out for the very serious side effect to AAS...CAS (Cable Acquisition Syndrome)!

~Michael

sukie
10-23-2010, 06:03 AM
That AAS (Amp Acquisition Syndrome)is usually seen in those who suffer from GAS (Guitar Acquisition Syndrome) or BAS (Bass Acquisition Syndrome), but it is pretty strong variant. My husband just got over a flare-up of AAS, by buying 2 small amps for his guitar. He was looking to buy just one small portable amp, but he couldn't decide which one he liked best, so he got two. Curse those Guitar Center people... "go ahead, take them both home and try them for 30 days, and return the one you didn't choose". Ha! They know what they're doing. So he has one electric guitar and 4 amps now (like I said, it was a flare-up of a previous condition).

UAS can also migrate to CAS (Case Acquisition Syndrome), SAS (String Acquisition Syndrome), and MBAS (Music Book Acquisition Syndrome). I am sure there are a few more...

–Lori

Jeez, Lori. I didn't need to know about all those types of syndromes. DANG. I think I can see a case of CAS coming my way. I do love a nice case.

hoosierhiver
10-23-2010, 06:04 AM
There's also the CBUAS version, where you must make several cigar box ukuleles within a couple of months before it passes.

jordan bello
10-23-2010, 06:25 AM
Lori's right. I've even had TAS, tuner acquisition syndrome.

raecarter
10-23-2010, 06:25 AM
I hope by buying an expensive one that I won't need anything else now! Can't wait for it to arrive new amp day!

fitncrafty
10-23-2010, 06:31 AM
Rae.. I feel for you! I got my Luna and in desperation have plugged it into my kids practice guitar amps. However, I want an amp SO bad! I hope soon!! I also want a mic (which I can't figure out why ( as why would I want to amplify my horrid singing) but it seems like the thing to do...
Not to mention I already have YAS (yarn acquisition syndrome) which came about 7 yrs ago! I also have 3 kids and 4 cats... Once you start it's hard to stop I guess! definitely a personality thing! Glad I don't love jewls so much!

Oh and a Very happy belated birthday to you!

Lori
10-23-2010, 07:06 AM
I nearly forgot HAS (Humidifier Acquisition Syndrome). I have had that pretty bad.
So far, my UAS has been slightly suppressed by having a custom uke in the queue at Mya-Moe. It won't be ready until early February, so knowing that is in the works has seemed to put me in a mild remission. However, if I come face to face with that new hi-low G– 5 string Ohana tenor... well.... my birthday was this month too! Such a good excuse!!
–Lori

Lori
10-23-2010, 07:12 AM
Watch out for the very serious side effect to AAS...CAS (Cable Acquisition Syndrome)!

~Michael

Oh yes, I forgot about that one! So true. My husband had that one too. A subset, for those into the tube amps is ATAS (Amp Tube Acquisition Syndrome)... a bit rarer, but very serious never-the-less.
–Lori

Jerlial Prophet
10-23-2010, 07:48 AM
GAS does stand for Guitar Acquisition Syndrome but it also stands for Gear Acquisition Syndrome which just about covers it all.

mm stan
10-23-2010, 07:48 AM
Aloah Rae,
Happy Birthday to ya!!! I bundle all mine up into EAS.....guess I'm in denial mode....Equipment Aquisition Syndrome...makes it sound not as bad with all the symptoms...
BTW I have a Marshall MG 15 DFX....and it does the job very well...they're reasonable priced too.. As always, I make sure before buying anything that I'm gonna make
use of it and not collect dust...would be a waste of money, buying something just for the heck of it.....Have Fun and Enjoy!!!"Keep strumming them Strings" MM Stan...

70sSanO
10-23-2010, 07:57 AM
The most lethal variant is VAS (Vintage Aquisition Syndrome). Although doctors have not pinpointed exactly when this strain first appeared, it is believed the first occurance was in the 1980's.

What makes this strain so dangerous is the insatiable desire to aquire objects that are no longer manufactured. If left unchecked it can cuase people to spend tens of thousands of dollars on guitars manufactured in the 50's and 60's that originally sold for a couple of hundred dollars.

The worst examples are typically men in their 50's that are willing to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on automobiles that represented the pinnacle of the industry long ago. Through their delusion they have convinced themsleves to spend many times more than a better engineered and built car would cost today.

Steps are being taken to try to prevent these people from spreading the disease by encouraging others not to drool or make over the owners of these vintage items. This only encourages more of this type of behavior.

I hope this helps.

John

raecarter
10-23-2010, 10:02 AM
When I was mainly guitar orientated I had PAS pick acquisition syndrome thank fully the uke stopped that until I found some felt covered 0.54 plectrums for the uke!

ADD
10-23-2010, 08:16 PM
Oh, I just wanted to wish you, Rae, a belated Happy Birthday!

Hippie Dribble
10-23-2010, 08:44 PM
aaah Rae

mmm...another case for Doctor Eugene...

Without examining you in person, indeed my friend I fear you have been afflicted with the not-so-rare AAS bug, the rabid offspring of the UAS bug, closely related to the GAS and BAS strains of the umbrella termed "Aquisition Bug" and source of all the variant strains of the syndrome.

Alas, prognosis for sufferers of this virus is not good, although a 3 step treatment plan has been prescribed and met with varying degrees of success:

step i. burn your computer
step ii build a mud brick hut in the bush and live off tap water and rice
step iii join a buddhist monastery

and Rae, as I always advise my clients, should the above treatments fail, take two aspirin and call me in the morning

always, your (friendly) Doctor Eugene

raecarter
10-23-2010, 09:17 PM
aaah Rae

mmm...another case for Doctor Eugene...

Without examining you in person, indeed my friend I fear you have been afflicted with the not-so-rare AAS bug, the rabid offspring of the UAS bug, closely related to the GAS and BAS strains of the umbrella termed "Aquisition Bug" and source of all the variant strains of the syndrome.

Alas, prognosis for sufferers of this virus is not good, although a 3 step treatment plan has been prescribed and met with varying degrees of success:

step i. burn your computer
step ii build a mud brick hut in the bush and live off tap water and rice
step iii join a buddhist monastery

and Rae, as I always advise my clients, should the above treatments fail, take two aspirin and call me in the morning

always, your (friendly) Doctor Eugene

I've just laughed out loud in bed. Has any of these cases led to divorce lol?

Hippie Dribble
10-23-2010, 10:12 PM
I've just laughed out loud in bed. Has any of these cases led to divorce lol?

sorry Rae,

I'm afraid that my clients' information is strictly confidential and cannot be disclosed to the public at large.

However, just between you and me, after numerous failed attempts at monastic existence, my wife left me several years ago citing "musical differences"...




...(I loved ukes and she was different :o).

always, your (friendly) Doctor Eugene

Lori
10-24-2010, 06:07 AM
I am afraid there are no cures, just management of the symptoms. Acquiring something for the collection seems to reset an internal clock, so well spaced purchases are helpful. For the most long lasting remissions, space out your purchases, and don't double up and get two at once. The internet is definitely an accelerant, especially eBay, so there should be limits placed there. Having something on order seems to trigger remission. If you can shift your interest to the PAS (Pick Acquisition Syndrome) mentioned above it will be much easier to live with... lower cost, easy to store, still pretty and shiny.
–Lori

GreatGazukes
10-24-2010, 10:00 AM
I think you have missed the usually undiagnosed A4-WS, which can be detected in a sufferer's home by sheets of paper covering most horizontal surfaces. These sheets of paper are usually covered in words and chord diagrams the sufferer will never live long enough to interpret into reasonable facsimiles of music. Sufferers can be spotted at gigs with binders of uncatalouged tatty paper that threaten to cover any horizontal surface they inhabit. Unchecked, A4 Wasting Syndrome eventually leads to deforestation and global warming, however it is beneficial for the colonies of silverfish it spawns.

joeybug
10-24-2010, 10:43 AM
I think you have missed the usually undiagnosed A4-WS, which can be detected in a sufferer's home by sheets of paper covering most horizontal surfaces. These sheets of paper are usually covered in words and chord diagrams the sufferer will never live long enough to interpret into reasonable facsimiles of music. Sufferers can be spotted at gigs with binders of uncatalouged tatty paper that threaten to cover any horizontal surface they inhabit. Unchecked, A4 Wasting Syndrome eventually leads to deforestation and global warming, however it is beneficial for the colonies of silverfish it spawns.

I think I have A4-WS, what do I do?!?!

fitncrafty
10-24-2010, 10:46 AM
I think I have A4-WS, what do I do?!?!

I have plenty printed... but I also save many into a one note notebook on the computer for 'later use'. I will never play all of these songs.

joeybug
10-24-2010, 10:52 AM
Fitncrafty...will use this post rather than make another one - stupid computer posting twice!

Anyway, I have both A4 printouts and notepad files on my PC AND an A5 notebook with chords, songs and such..some of which I can play, others I have no hope of playing!

raecarter
10-24-2010, 11:24 AM
I actually have a4ws genuinely but never thought about it that is brilliant

Teek
10-24-2010, 12:26 PM
Oh my word, God help us all.

I used to be an artist and then an artist and antiques dealer, which is an acellerant for any type of AS.

I have had YAS (yarn) and OPAS (oil paint) and now I just entered GAS which never would have occurred to me as a subset affliction that would strike ME, but I had previously in my younger days had a series of guitars that ended up being classicals, at one point had 3 of the same model circa 60's Goya classical, wish I had one of them now. All were sold when I broke right hand and then later left ring finger.

Then I discovered ukulele, and I could get my hands and fingers folded around the tiny neck! I was charmed out of my socks! Got UAS. Have a closet full and then got some cheap vintage plastics for the wall (my walls are covered in paintings). Started listening to blues stuff on YouTube trying to figure some of it out for uke, found out about the Harmony 929 or Stella model, cheap piece of crap that can sound awesome in the right hands which are not mine, but while I was brokering a deal for one off Craigslist in the garage of the local Guitar Center (which I have NEVER previously visited), my terrific sharpshooting website bought another off eBay for me! Even visualizing a nice maple banjo uke from Mainland next spring didn't help. I already have this circa 1959 tank cleaned up and am fine tuning a new nut for it. What a monster! And OMG the STEEL STRINGS! But holy mole the sound.

And this is like 3 days after the luthier who is fixing my vintage pineapple told me about a guy who keeps buying all these old cheap crap guitars off eBay and bringing them to him to fix! LOL! I think he whammied me.

I expect to re-CL it and get my money back when I'm done fooling with it. Funny part my hubby didn't even bat an eye, he is inured now.

SAS, string acquisition syndrome, I have a drawer full.

Good thing I can't afford Ducatis!

Chris Tarman
10-24-2010, 03:40 PM
I have a guitarist friend who has ITSAS. Ibanez Tube Screamer Acquisition Syndrome. He has, I believe, 8 or 9 Tube Screamers (that sickly green distortion pedal) of different vintages. I believe he needs serious help. He even looks for variations in the green color.

Teek
10-24-2010, 08:13 PM
So I was in my office on the computer playing FarmVille and my hubby comes in to grab the Stella. I say "You can't play it, I have the nut off it" and he's like "Dang!" and walks out. It had a tiny piece out of the edge of the nut right next to the 6th string is why I decided to make a new nut out of tusq, and thought it would also sound better than plastic.

An hour or so later I'm out in the garage sanding the snot out of it to finalize the size because I am not set up for luthier work. I fine tune the slots and go pop it back in, voila! Tune it back up, action is perfect, sounds great, hubby comes in to listen, goes "WOW, I can't believe the SOUND" and I hand it over and he hustles off to the couch and boots up a YouTube how to video on his laptop on the coffee table. The Stella is now parked on the couch corner snuggled up with a pillow at its back and an afghan around its bottom. I had said it was his if he wanted and made noises about putting it back on CL after I decided which one I liked better (and also called it "Godzilla" because it is so heavy), but it may have been claimed. He has three days off starting tomorrow while I'm working to practice in private.

I found his weakness. And ammunition, lol. I'm going to tell him I don't care how many guitars he wants, just so I'm not tripping over them. Hope he likes the second one too. Don't know if he's strong enough to tough out the steel strings, but apparently he'd been reading up all about guitar stuff since I brought it home last night and he heard it with new strings, because he was talking about how you have to get callouses etc. Ha! And yesterday he told me his hands were made only for motorcycle clutches and mountain bike brakes. :rolleyes:

Hope it lasts!

portlandjosh
10-24-2010, 08:34 PM
Funny discussion. My UAS has been under control, knowing that my garage sale Kamaka Gold Label was busy being restored in Hawaii. I just found out it is on its way back to me, so I'm hoping that having my new (old) uke will keep it at bay for a bit longer...

Lori
10-25-2010, 06:17 AM
I found his weakness. And ammunition, lol. I'm going to tell him I don't care how many guitars he wants, just so I'm not tripping over them. Hope he likes the second one too. Don't know if he's strong enough to tough out the steel strings, but apparently he'd been reading up all about guitar stuff since I brought it home last night and he heard it with new strings, because he was talking about how you have to get callouses etc. Ha! And yesterday he told me his hands were made only for motorcycle clutches and mountain bike brakes. :rolleyes:

Hope it lasts!
You have him right where you want him! Good job! There is nothing like having your spouse have a version of "_AS" to give your UAS a guilt-free ticket. If he bogs down on the steel string problem, switch him to an electric guitar. My husband had an acoustic guitar for years, but it was too uncomfortable to play for long, and for years he struggled with it. When he finally got an electric (which was his first impulse anyway, and he was talked out of it by his brother and his friends), his ability took off, and he started writing songs. That will bring you to the AAS listed by the OP and possibly the PAS (Pedal Acquisition Syndrome). I know that if we just stayed away from all these temptations, we would be boring and normal like other people. I would rather be UAS afflicted, and be interesting and happy. Enjoy life!
–Lori

joeybug
10-25-2010, 06:38 AM
You have him right where you want him! Good job! There is nothing like having your spouse have a version of "_AS" to give your UAS a guilt-free ticket. If he bogs down on the steel string problem, switch him to an electric guitar. My husband had an acoustic guitar for years, but it was too uncomfortable to play for long, and for years he struggled with it. When he finally got an electric (which was his first impulse anyway, and he was talked out of it by his brother and his friends), his ability took off, and he started writing songs. That will bring you to the AAS listed by the OP and possibly the PAS (Pedal Acquisition Syndrome). I know that if we just stayed away from all these temptations, we would be boring and normal like other people. I would rather be UAS afflicted, and be interesting and happy. Enjoy life!
–Lori

My SO is obsessed with Star Wars, I let him buy 6 million copies of it everytime it's released, he lets me buy Ukuleles...fair deal to me :D

mds725
10-25-2010, 08:19 AM
I think I have a variant of UAS called BOAS ("Branching Out" Acquisition Syndrome). It seems to have struck AFTER I'd already loaded up on strings, music books, sheet music, chord books and charts, music fret stamps (http://www.aeromark.net/selfinkers/fret_stamps.html) for drawing chord shapes on sheet music, cases and gig bags, tuners, hand exercisers (http://www.prohands.net/dealer/), microfiber cloths, uke leashes (http://www.ukeleash.com/) and straps, humidifiers, and hygrometers. The ukulele was my first string instrument, but now I want to acquire other string instuments. I recently got a strumstick and I've been looking at guitars. And I really want to learn to play that Kala U-Bass. And I may have to acquire a new place to live to store all this stuff!

Landshark
10-25-2010, 08:08 PM
I have suffered from SAS (Stuff Acquisition Syndrome) for years, it's been bikes, cameras, lenses, filters, stands, tripods, fishing rods, reels, lures, tents, camping stuff, cars, pots and pans, pocket knives, Japanese cooking knives, kitchen tools, audio, video, folk art, books, masks, guitars, amps, tuners, straps, pedals, ukuleles, cases, bags, tools, sunglasses, pets, plants, wine, etc, fortunately I have never been afflicted with the other form of SAS (Spouse Acquisition Syndrome) happily in love with just one wife for 31 years.

fitncrafty
10-26-2010, 01:18 AM
I have suffered from SAS (Stuff Acquisition Syndrome) for years, it's been bikes, cameras, lenses, filters, stands, tripods, fishing rods, reels, lures, tents, camping stuff, cars, pots and pans, pocket knives, Japanese cooking knives, kitchen tools, audio, video, folk art, books, masks, guitars, amps, tuners, straps, pedals, ukuleles, cases, bags, tools, sunglasses, pets, plants, wine, etc, fortunately I have never been afflicted with the other form of SAS (Spouse Acquisition Syndrome) happily in love with just one wife for 31 years.

That's a lot of afflictions! That wife of your must be a real keeper! Congrats! It's great to know that people make it and are happy for that many years!