My Ukulele Attacked Me.

SuzukHammer

SuzukHammer

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I'm pretty sure I'm gonna have a shiner tomorrow. There is blood under my right eye. I have documented the blood with pictures.

My wife is laughing.

She told me that I play too much and my ukulele is angry.

I'm thinking about going to the police but I think I'll wait until the shiner comes out so I'll look more pathetic for the cops to take me seriously.

The suspect is a Amoeba Music Fluke. My blood wound looks exactly like the screw end of the tuner peg. I'm sure we'll find the pattern matches the screw on the Fluke.

How did this happen?? I was learning Old Macdonald Had a Farm while laying down in bed. I was doing some Peter Townsend windmill chords. I'm pretty sure it was a G and then

KAPOW!!! Without any warning. My Fluke attacked me.

My wife is laughing. :D

Watch out for those laminates!!!! You really don't know their heritage. :D
 
Rub some dirt on it and get back to playin' your uke. Seriously, I wish you a speedy recovery.
 
If you get throwed off the horse you just git back on. Unless you landed in a cactus, then you just roll around screamin and moanin for a while first.
 
It knew you were thinking about buying a new uke. Never think about buying a new uke unless all your other ukes are in their cases. They get very jealous sometimes.
 
Wow that is a little funny. sorry to say..Lesson learned, I wont play uke lying down! Where's the photos?

feel better!
 
Aloha Frank,
Did you cheat on your Amoeba Music fluke???? My guess it got jealous.....he he I hope your eye get s better soon....take care, MM Stan
 
Let me get this straight. You were in bed learning Old MacDonald Had A Farm on your ukulele? This is Saturday night that this happened, correct? I would check for your wives finger prints on the other end of the Fluke.
 
Maybe that uke needs a Uke Leash! And possibly it feels it is the alpha in the relationship, and you need you need to project calm assertive energy with this one..?

Is this why guitars etc. are called "axes"? Or in the case of a ukulele, a "hatchet"?? :(

Ice pack, and a few doses of arnica gel for the bruising, but don't get the gel in your eye. Both work wonders especially if applied quickly.

Ouch! And feel better!
 
Great info Teek. I applied ice immediately but I have never heard of Arnica gel. I'm gonna get some of that.

It is morning and there is no bruising but there is a scab there so pictures will be good.

Perhaps I need to explain this fluke accident.

The reason for learning Old Macdonald Had a farm is because I just met a man and his daughter I hadn't seen in a year. THe last time I saw her, I knew nothing about ukuleles and played Old Maconald on my harmonica to her. SO.... I will play that on uke for her hopefully this week.

THe Peter Townsend windmill is a great technique but I let loose of the chord fingering before the end of the windmill caught the edge of the uke and it flipped right to my eye.

I got lucky as it hit below my eye. Pics to follow.
 
DSC00694.jpg
 
To quote Mr. Waters: "Careful with that axe, Eugene!"
I just looked at the screw on the tuner of my Flea. I'd say that's a perfect match. You can even see the phillips head slots in your eyelid.
 
Chris Tarman said:
To quote Mr. Waters: "Careful with that axe, Eugene!"
I just looked at the screw on the tuner of my Flea. I'd say that's a perfect match. You can even see the phillips head slots in your eyelid.
Click to expand...

That's yesterday's picture. Today, it looks like one big splotch so if anybody else gets attacked take the pics early to capture the instrument used in an attack.

I don't know maybe, I need to pad my ukuleles now and put corner guards on the headstock.
 
Or you might have to consider a hockey mask & helmet...

Then make a film:

Halloween XIV: Night of the Living Uke

-Kurt
 
Parents everywhere now have a new response to kids pleading that they really really really want a ukulele for Christmas.


"Don't be silly, you'll put your eye out!"


Very glad that didn't hit you in the eye and cut or abrade your cornea, that was too close. :eek:
 
Yes that was very close. I do feel lucky. I'd hate to be having dinner and some person asked me how I took out my eye.

bb gun? no
running with scissors? no
fork ?? no

then how?? .........well...... you see.........My ukulele attacked me when I was in bed alone with it.

<humiliating laughter follows>
 
SuzukHammer said:
Yes that was very close. I do feel lucky. I'd hate to be having dinner and some person asked me how I took out my eye.

bb gun? no
running with scissors? no
fork ?? no

then how?? .........well...... you see.........My ukulele attacked me when I was in bed alone with it.

<humiliating laughter follows>
Click to expand...


I'm sorry but that made me :rofl: I hope the Ukulele responsible is caught and punished! :rofl: Feel better soon!
 
I know I wrote a thread about the flea/fluke's ability to withstand it's being wielded as a weapon, but I want to say for the record that I plead the fifth XD
 
luckly it was right under, your eye, not right on your eye
the part were your wife was laughing id have to admit made my day
the chances of getting attacked by your musical instrument usually only happens in deathmetal XD
best of luck on the healing though...
 
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