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View Full Version : Is there a UAS patch to reduce cravings?



GinnyT11
11-28-2011, 08:26 AM
Like a nicotine patch, we need a similar patch that will reduce/negate powerful UAS cravings.

You know the scenario: You think you're satisfied with your pod/harem/strum of ukes, but then---fool!---you take just a quick look at the uke marketplace and there...what to your wondering eyes should appear but a beautiful uke that you didn't even know you wanted! Oh, it's different from what you have, and oh, the price is fair, and aughhhh...the uke fund is empty!!

That's when you'd slap on a extended-release UAS patch---if there was one---to keep you calm. What would be in this patch? Valium? Chamomile? Opium...?

Kanaka916
11-28-2011, 08:48 AM
Make your wife the CFO and all transactions go through her.

roxhum
11-28-2011, 10:14 AM
Ha ha GT3T11 is the wife. If the uke fund is empty it is empty. I am having the same problem. Where is that patch?

fitncrafty
11-28-2011, 10:21 AM
An empty bank account!

roxhum
11-28-2011, 10:23 AM
I could always skip paying my property taxes. No wait, then I wouldn't have any place to keep my ukes.

PoiDog
11-28-2011, 10:25 AM
My "patch" was a simple two-step process:

1) Save extra cash here and there as you can for about 6 months ($5 here, $20 there), then take that money and buy a top-shelf brand (for me it was the Kanile'a) without going into debt or needing to hock something

2) Suddenly find yourself staring down needing to find new housing and talking with mortgage brokers, real estate agents, and the like.

After that, getting another uke suddenly seems much, much less important!

TheOnlyUkeThatMatters
11-28-2011, 12:52 PM
Unfortunately, all the UAS-patches adhere to the palm of your fretting hand and have brand names starting with K. Also, the effect of the UAS-patch only lasts minutes (or possibly weeks, depending on the UAS-sufferer).

mr moonlight
11-28-2011, 02:05 PM
The patches are easy to get. I get one with every uke purchase. They last about a month, then you need to puchase another uke to get your next patch. Simple simple.

Jnobianchi
11-28-2011, 02:10 PM
I found that the best cure was to give in and get the dream ukes. After I did that (Gibson UB1 and UB2, Ludwig Wendell Hall and Martin Style 0), others seems frivolous and I've been able to stop myself. Right now, the only dream ukes left are the Ludwig BU with Crowns, the Gibson U3 or UB3, and the Martin Style 3 or 5. Since I can't afford any one of them (all in the $2K-5K range), my UAS stays in check.

Now if I came into money, that would really be horrible. :D

Nickie
11-28-2011, 02:34 PM
Yes, they go under the arm, and are made of mahogany, bamboo, koa or acacia. They last a long time.

Lori
11-28-2011, 03:31 PM
One of the best UAS suppressants is to put a custom uke on order. If there is a long waiting list, all the better. Figure out your dream uke (within your possible long term budget) and get it in a custom building queue. Then, every time you see a new temptation, you just think of that custom one that will come in 6-8 months.

–Lori

CTurner
11-28-2011, 04:16 PM
Patches?! We don't need no stinking patches!
As the husband of GT3T11 in this sad UAS-state of affairs, let me say right here and now that I am not responsible for my wife's uke condition. No sirree. Because I keep my own uke emotions in check. That's right, one of us on this team is under control. But you see, at least half the ukes I currently own are the direct result of my wife's saying something like, "Dear, look at this one, it is really gorgeous, you don't have one like that do you?!" (and smiling sweetly all the time) And there you are, under the sway of her loving intentions I take one more step down that UAS road.
So actually, it's not my fault I have a wonderful stable of ukes and am currently paying off my latest acquisition.
Come to think of it, how many of those UAS patches come in a box?

fabioponta
11-28-2011, 04:22 PM
I think UAS is a dangerous virus with no cure. It can be controlled from one year to another, but it is a mutant virus and unpredictable ... few days after being in the danger zones (marketplace, uketalk), you may be infected by a new version, insatiable, swift and overwhelming...

sweetiecino
11-28-2011, 06:07 PM
It is fun to talk about UAS and trying to stop it. If you are serious, get serious. Owning a ukulele can be about having a pretty wooden musical box to carry around and show off or it can be about making music for pleasure and communication. If you truly want to stop UAS, focus on the music. Write out a rotating setlist of say 10 tunes and learn to play them well, in your own arrangement. Spend your time worrying about playing better. A lot of UAS for me is the frustration of not seeming to improve musically, so instead of focusing on the problem, it is easier to spend some money and buy another uke as a distraction.
If you have several ukes already, look at the music you like and work them into your playlist. Maybe keep one tuned to D one to C and one to Bb? When you find that your current ukes can't get the sound you want or don't have enough notes on them, then look for another uke. Base the decision on the music not the looks or socializing.

Agree! I've given myself a goal to reach before I can get my next uke i.e. if I can play a certain song well then I'll consider another uke =)

TCK
11-28-2011, 06:26 PM
I could always skip paying my property taxes. No wait, then I wouldn't have any place to keep my ukes.
You could always keep them at my house.
Ugh, I set goals, I play a lot...I am saving for custom. Nothing works!
Dang you Stromberg Viosinette (and my cursed BAUS). They seem so cheap at the time, until you have five vintage Banjo Ukes. and you are sleeping on the floor and giving them the bed...
And all that rings in your head all day is "If you knew Susie..."
And you tell your wife it would be hot if she dressed like a flapper.
I need a patch BAD.

Dan Uke
11-28-2011, 06:42 PM
One of the best UAS suppressants is to put a custom uke on order. If there is a long waiting list, all the better. Figure out your dream uke (within your possible long term budget) and get it in a custom building queue. Then, every time you see a new temptation, you just think of that custom one that will come in 6-8 months.

–Lori

This can have the opposite effect!! I KNOW!!!

roxhum
11-29-2011, 03:54 AM
I am actually using Lori's strategy. After getting my Kamaka there has been no other uke (in my price range) that calls out to me. I do miss Mr. UPS Man coming to my door. And... I am on Brad Donaldson's build list and having fun planning my next uke due in the Spring.

joejeweler
11-29-2011, 05:52 AM
Ha ha GT3T11 is the wife. If the uke fund is empty it is empty. I am having the same problem. Where is that patch?

Isn't that why man invented "Plastic"? (as in Visa, Mastercard, etc.)

......uke fund empty be damned! :D

Big_e
11-29-2011, 11:51 AM
The Ohana Sopranino is the perfect patch to soothe the UAS. :)

OldePhart
11-29-2011, 12:26 PM
The best patch for UAS (for probably 90% of "sufferers," anyway) is to stop buying ukes that are "good enough" and save for that special, high-end uke, be it a KoAloha, other K-brand, luthier built, etc. Unless you really have a bonafide personality disorder involving hording, that will do it for most folks. Some of the less expensive ukes are very good values (Mainlands, in particular, are among my favorites) but even they aren't the kind of "top-drawer" that ends the itch more or less permanently.

I love my Mainland mango tenor, and don't feel any need to upgrade from it. But, my main axe is a KoAloha longneck soprano - if I was primarily a tenor player I'd probably want a top-end tenor before I could consider my UAS cured - or at least in remission. :)

Of course, some folks are more the eye-candy sort - they desire a new uke because they like the looks of it. For me, I like nice woods but the only reason to buy a new uke is because it is going to sound better or play more easily. If it doesn't at least have a strong potential to pass one or both of those tests it can be the prettiest thing ever made and it's not going to pry my wallet open. I may ooh and aaah, but those are free. LOL

John

Jnobianchi
11-30-2011, 10:55 AM
You could always keep them at my house.
Ugh, I set goals, I play a lot...I am saving for custom. Nothing works!
Dang you Stromberg Viosinette (and my cursed BAUS). They seem so cheap at the time, until you have five vintage Banjo Ukes. and you are sleeping on the floor and giving them the bed...
And all that rings in your head all day is "If you knew Susie..."
And you tell your wife it would be hot if she dressed like a flapper.
I need a patch BAD.

Whoa - you have got it bad, man.

But seriously, I do subscribe to the buy the best you can and leave the other stuff alone. That's working for me - that and focusing on playing when I can clear the deck...

Nickie
11-30-2011, 04:26 PM
I read in the news today that the Chinese are coming up with a vaccine...

OldePhart
12-01-2011, 12:12 PM
I read in the news today that the Chinese are coming up with a vaccine...
Careful, it will probably contain lead and styrene... LOL