ukulele jokes

[h-drix]

Everyone needs a good lol now and then, what are some good uke jokes.

now i could do a google search but that would be incredible boring now wouldn't it.

 

[seeso]

What's the difference between a uke player and a large pepperoni pizza?

The pizza can feed a family of four .

 

[UKISOCIETY]

What's "perfect pitch"?

When you throw the ukulele into the garbage can without hitting the rim.

 

[SailQwest]

When people ask if his ukulele is a guitar, Rich likes to tell them, "Yes, and so far I've learned to play the first four strings."

 

[brokenwing]

You could just take all the accordian jokes and insert "ukulele"

 

[LonnaB]

What's the difference between a fiddle and a violin?


Who cares, neither one is an ukulele!

 

[Hikingstevo]

Ukulele & banjo players

A banjo player and his wife were woken at 3 o'clock in the morning by loud knocking on the door.
The banjo player got up, went to the door and found a ukulele player standing in the pouring rain.
"I need a push", said the ukulele player.
"Not a chance", said the banjo player, "it's 3 o'clock in the morning", slammed the door and went back to bed.
"Who was that?" asked his wife.
"Just some ukulele player bloke asking for a push", he answered.
"Did you help him?", she asked.
"No, I did not, it's 3 o'clock in the morning and it's pouring rain outside" he said.
"Well, .... you have a short memory", said the wife, "don't you remember, about three months ago when we broke down, and those two nice young men helped us?. I think you should help him and you should be ashamed of yourself".
The banjo player does as he's told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pouring rain.
He called out into the dark night, "Hello, are you still there?".
"Yes" comes back the answer.
"Do you still need a push?", called the banjo player.
"Yes please", came the reply from the dark.
"Where are you?", asked the banjo player.
The ukulele player replied, "Over here on the swing".

 

[seeso]

A banjo player and his wife were woken at 3 o'clock in the morning by loud knocking on the door.
The banjo player got up, went to the door and found a ukulele player standing in the pouring rain.
"I need a push", said the ukulele player.
"Not a chance", said the banjo player, "it's 3 o'clock in the morning", slammed the door and went back to bed.
"Who was that?" asked his wife.
"Just some ukulele player bloke asking for a push", he answered.
"Did you help him?", she asked.
"No, I did not, it's 3 o'clock in the morning and it's pouring rain outside" he said.
"Well, .... you have a short memory", said the wife, "don't you remember, about three months ago when we broke down, and those two nice young men helped us?. I think you should help him and you should be ashamed of yourself".
The banjo player does as he's told, gets dressed, and goes out into the pouring rain.
He called out into the dark night, "Hello, are you still there?".
"Yes" comes back the answer.
"Do you still need a push?", called the banjo player.
"Yes please", came the reply from the dark.
"Where are you?", asked the banjo player.
The ukulele player replied, "Over here on the swing".

Haha hah! That was great! Keep 'em coming!

 

[jjsdad]

Can anyone come up with a good answer to the following classic questions:

Q: How many ukulele players does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Q: Why did the ukulele player cross the street?

Q: What's the difference between a ukulele player and a guitar player?

Q: Why does a ukulele only have 4 strings?

Q: Why is the ukulele the easiest instrument to learn?

 

[UkuLeLesReggAe]

What's the difference between a fiddle and a violin?


Who cares, neither one is an ukulele!

LMFAO! +rep hahaha, made me laugh

 

[fxmatador]

What did the soprano ukulele say to the baritone ukulele?

Yea, but how big is your wenis?

 

[h-drix]

Can anyone come up with a good answer to the following classic questions:

Q: How many ukulele players does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A)10, 1 to screw it in, 8 to comment on how fast aldrines fingers are and the last to spam random stuff. =p
Q: Why did the ukulele player cross the street?
A)to try to find his other strings
Q: What's the difference between a ukulele player and a guitar player?
A)the guitar gets the money AND girls
Q: Why does a ukulele only have 4 strings?
A)cause we cant count to six
Q: Why is the ukulele the easiest instrument to learn?
A)CAUSE OF UU :bowdown:

HAHAHA best i could do at 1 in the mourning.

 

[Bassukuguy]

What did the soprano ukulele say to the baritone ukulele?

i feel that a better answer is, Look at that huge nut...

 

[Guting]

What's the difference between a fiddle and a violin?


Who cares, neither one is an ukulele!

lolz !

 

[Fred Miu]

i feel that a better answer is, Look at that huge nut...

LOL ahahaa sounds better

 

[Crow]

Here's the oldest one on record:

A ukulele player suddenly realizes he left his vintage ukulele out in his car over night. He rushes outside and his heart drops when he sees that his car window is broken. Fearing the worst, he peeks through the window and finds that there are now five ukuleles in his car.

 

[h-drix]

HAHAHA best one yet. ++

 

[edmundwhitehead]

What is the difference between a ukulele and a trampoline? People take their shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

 

[Bassukuguy]

What is the Range of a Tenor Ukulele?
-about 20-30 feet depending on the wind...

What is the diffrence Between a Banjo and a Ukulele?
-it takes half as long to burn a ukulele...

What do you call a ukulele player who broke up with his girlfriend?
-Homeless...

What is the diffrence between a Ukulele player, and a Savings bond?
-a savings bond will eventually mature and make money...

What is the diffrence between a ukulele and an onion?
-nobody cries when you cut up a ukulele...

How many ukulele players does it take to change a lightbulb?
-five, one to actually do it and four to say how much better Jake Shimabukuro would have done it

and i am done... hopefully someone laughed...

Bassukuguy

 

[lovemissheather]

and i am done... hopefully someone laughed...

Bassukuguy

feel accomplished, cause i sure did laugh.