Obsessed Ukulele Hoarder - needs MOAR - read inside :)

Booli

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YUP, that's right - I admit it.

I am an obsessed player of the ukulele, and can never have enough - I realized that my compulsion will never be satisfied, until I have at lease ONE OF EACH, of ALL the THINGS, related to UKULELE.

Spring cleaning?
Downsizing?
Feel guilty that it gets little or no play time?
Got ukulele CDs you never listen to any more?
Got any music books just gathering dust?
Tenor is neglected since you got hooked on sopranino?

Become totally guilt-free and send it all to me, where I will cherish and care for it until the end of time.

Please carefully pack and ship your items to the address enclosed or inquire within for further details.

All donations will be carefully and meticulously handled and stored in a climate-controlled and hermetically sealed environment when not in use.

Payment to you will be in the form of my eternal gratitude and friendship, and when Providence manifests itself, payback in proper karma.

Mahalo!

Booli


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(FYI: this is only HALF tounge-in-cheek and satire of UAS, which runs deep for many, and is defined in quite a few different ways depending what opinion you are reading)

This is only a joke, until (and if, and it's a BIG if) folks actually send me anything.

Donations gladly accepted, but I will still be very happy if this post has only made you laugh, but please dont hate me, as I'm only trying to be funny here. :)
 
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Booli, when I am so rich that I don't need them anymore, you can have all my back issues of Ukulele Magazine, all the strings I take off my ukes, and my tuners when they break, and all the sheet music of the songs I know by heart.
Funny guy.....
 
Booli, when I am so rich that I don't need them anymore, you can have all my back issues of Ukulele Magazine, all the strings I take off my ukes, and my tuners when they break, and all the sheet music of the songs I know by heart.
Funny guy.....

Nickie - thanks ever so much for thinking of me. You know I love you, right? :)
 
dang an self admitted hoarder.. never ever heard of one.. :) you can send me the over flow if you don't have room Booli :)
 
'bout to say... I thought you were totally hooked on your Fluke.

To be honest though, I'm thinking of selling one of mine!
 
You should have caught me two years ago when I went through 16 ukes in a year. But now I have an alternate place to give them, the Ukulele Kids Club ((plug them whenever I get the opportunity, see my signature). With only about a year of bass behind me, I'm still accumulating bass ukes, so nothing for you there.
 
I always liked Hoarders on A&E. Too bad they can't reboot it for UAS!
 
No hoarder problem here, they all get a turn! :)

Might be running out of storage space, but then I remembered that I could hang them from the ceiling, so plenty more room for UAS. :D
 
Wait a minute Booli...
You mean we're allowed to have more than one uke!!!!

Oh boy this is a game changer.
;)
 
Wait a minute Booli...
You mean we're allowed to have more than one uke!!!!

Oh boy this is a game changer.
;)

Thankfully there is no restricted allotment of musical instruments enforced by govt authorities or otherwise in the USA, yet. :D

For me would be a bare minimum of 6 ukes in the following configurations:

Tenor in both high and low G, i.e. both re-entrant and linear tunings of GCEA (C6)
Baritone in both high and low D, i.e. both re-entrant and linear tunings of DGBE (G6)
Tenor in linear fifths tuning of CGDA (mandola, viola, tenor guitar, plectrum banjo)
Baritone in linear fifths tuning of GDAE (mandocello, cello, Irish tenor banjo)

--

But alas, I have not counted the permutations with different tonewoods, nor concert and soprano scale lengths.

Also not included here are 'solid-body' electric variations for silent night-time practice in headphones or for travel...
 
I actually threw a uke in the trash the other day, my first uke at that. I was planning to scavenge it for the tuners etc, but my wife emptied the trash when I didnt notice :p.
(I had dropped the uke and it had several large cracks as a result)
 
I actually threw a uke in the trash the other day, my first uke at that. I was planning to scavenge it for the tuners etc, but my wife emptied the trash when I didnt notice :p.
(I had dropped the uke and it had several large cracks as a result)


OH NOES!

not to make you feel bad........but

Tuners, neck, freboard, bridge, nut and saddle can all be salvaged from a smashed/cracked body uke provided that the cracks are beyond repair.

Then you can get a cigar box for $2 and rebuild it into something truly your own.
 
Sorry Booli, I don't have any extra ukes or uke accessories laying around. I do have some ukulele books that I might send you some day, but right now I'm too lazy to find where I put them. You might as well have them, I'm not using them. They all say the same thing, but they are ukulele books, some people say that you can't have too many ukulele books. We just had a garage sale last weekend and it was quite a success. We made over four hundred dollars. No ukes were sold in the process though. I did sell two trumpets. I don't play the trumpet. I'm not sure how I got two trumpets. That is what happens when you accumulate STUFF. But even so, Monday I hauled two truck loads of stuff to Goodwill, nine boxes of books to the library, filled two garbage cans with trash, and I put some old power tools that didn't sell on the curb, and luckily they were gone the next day. But nothing to do with ukuleles. That is because I am trying to keep my ukulele enthusiasm under control from the start, and sometimes it is not easy, especially with four hundred bucks cash in my pocket.
 
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Sorry Booli, I don't have any extra ukes or uke accessories laying around. I do have some ukulele books that I might send you some day, but right now I'm too lazy to find where I put them. You might as well have them, I'm not using them. They all say the same thing, but they are ukulele books, some people say that you can't have too many ukulele books. We just had a garage sale last weekend and it was quite a success. We made over four hundred dollars. No ukes were sold in the process though. I did sell two trumpets. I don't play the trumpet. I'm not sure how I got two trumpets. That is what happens when you accumulate STUFF. But even so, Monday I hauled two truck loads of stuff to Goodwill, nine boxes of books to the library, filled two garbage cans with trash, and I put some old power tools that didn't sell on the curb, and luckily they were gone the next day. But nothing to do with ukuleles. That is because I am trying to keep my ukulele enthusiasm under control from the start, and sometimes it is not easy, especially with four hundred bucks cash in my pocket.


No worries. Thanks for thinking of me.

I created this thread more in protest or satire of certain forms of UAS, and not so much to stockpile stuff.

I do not expect anything from anyone.

This was more for irony or comic relief.
 
Booli, you never know what satirical gift might show up at your door, now.
 
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