For Those of You Who Play at Nursing Homes - A Look at Some of Your Audience

[SweetWaterBlue]

In nursing homes, impoverished live final days on pennies

PHILADELPHIA (AP) — New pants to replace Alex Morisey’s tattered khakis will have to wait. There’s no cash left for sugar-free cookies either.

apnews.com

 

[TBB]

This is incredibly sad. Since my dad died last year, leaving my mum on her own after 60 years together, I’ve been thinking a lot about how awful old age can be and how much more difficult it must be for people who don’t have any family to help them out.

Having been diagnosed with cancer in my 40’s I definitely think that growing old beats the alternative (imo living fast and dying young only seems romantic while you’re fairly confident it’s not going to happen to you), but there’s no getting around the fact that old age can be brutal.

 

[SweetWaterBlue]

This is incredibly sad. Since my dad died last year, leaving my mum on her own after 60 years together, I’ve been thinking a lot about how awful old age can be and how much more difficult it must be for people who don’t have any family to help them out.

Having been diagnosed with cancer in my 40’s I definitely think that growing old beats the alternative (imo living fast and dying young only seems romantic while you’re fairly confident it’s not going to happen to you), but there’s no getting around the fact that old age can be brutal.

Playing at such places can be sad sometimes, but I also feel blessed to be able to do so. I am also thankful that I was able to care for my Dad in his later years, as he did for my Mom.

 

[TBB]

Playing at such places can be sad sometimes, but I also feel blessed to be able to do so.

It’s a lovely thing to be able to do, and must be a real joy for the residents.

I am also thankful that I was able to care for my Dad in his later years, as he did for my Mom.

I agree, I’m so grateful that I’m able to look after mum now, a little payback for all the care my parents have given me all my life.

 

[Jerryc41]

We used to play at a couple of nursing homes, but Covid put an end to that. Some people paid attention and sang along, while others just sat there. We did brighten their day, though.

 

[eyedoc]

I routinely play in care-facilities and hospitals, often 2-3 times a month. It is very rewarding for the residents/patients as well as me.
We are sponsored by a grant to do so, which gives us a small honorarium for each performance, (which goes towards gas and music!)
I also get to perform for many residents there that are my patients....though many don't recognize me out of context!
Ron

 

[Nickie]

We don't play in SNFS per se. But I've worked in a few, saddest places I ever saw. We do play in several ALFs. For the most part, they are alert and attentive, some even come up to us and offer to tow our gear to the bandwagon at the end.
I just read the other day where the last year of life is the most expensive. So nice to have that to look forward to. /S
My Mom, age 94, is considering relocating to an ALF. I hope there are some decent entertainers going there for her, she'll still be 1200 miles away. If our band ever breaks up, I'm headed out that way.

 

[Voran]

I don't plan on getting all that old. Enjoying being alive right now, but I refuse to rot in a nursing home. No one is going to be wiping my bottom, preventing me from wandering around remote mountain areas, or telling me I can't drink Red Bull.

 

[Nickie]

I don't plan on getting all that old. Enjoying being alive right now, but I refuse to rot in a nursing home. No one is going to be wiping my bottom, preventing me from wandering around remote mountain areas, or telling me I can't drink Red Bull.

Believe me, 0% of the SNF patients I've cared for chose that path. Most people's families don't want to let go of them when the quality of life goes downhill. Mom is 94 next week, and if she says it's her time to go, I'll believe her.
Americans in particular, are taught that death is bad. i don't think so. Dying, the process of it can be a beeotch, and that's why I became a hospice volunteer, then a hospice nurse.
Compassion and Choices is a non profit group that is trying to get legislation passed in all 50 states to allow Dr assisted suicide. I joined it. All people deserve to die with dignity.

 

[Voran]

Believe me, 0% of the SNF patients I've cared for chose that path. Most people's families don't want to let go of them when the quality of life goes downhill. Mom is 94 next week, and if she says it's her time to go, I'll believe her.
Americans in particular, are taught that death is bad. i don't think so. Dying, the process of it can be a beeotch, and that's why I became a hospice volunteer, then a hospice nurse.
Compassion and Choices is a non profit group that is trying to get legislation passed in all 50 states to allow Dr assisted suicide. I joined it. All people deserve to die with dignity.

What can I do to join and help? I'm from Ireland, but I feel strongly about this.

 

[kkimura]

Congress needs to raise the allowance.

 

[captain-janeway]

Believe me, 0% of the SNF patients I've cared for chose that path. Most people's families don't want to let go of them when the quality of life goes downhill. Mom is 94 next week, and if she says it's her time to go, I'll believe her.
Americans in particular, are taught that death is bad. i don't think so. Dying, the process of it can be a beeotch, and that's why I became a hospice volunteer, then a hospice nurse.
Compassion and Choices is a non profit group that is trying to get legislation passed in all 50 states to allow Dr assisted suicide. I joined it. All people deserve to die with dignity.

I absolutely agree. I had families who basically flogged their loved ones back to "life." They're bed bound and non communicative . At this point it's about the "loved one." They'll blame it on some religious thing or the fact that they're not ready to let go. They all say they wouldn't want to be in the same position and don't see the contradiction. It's so sad.
Make sure you all have your Durable Power of Attorneys done to list your wishes and make sure family knows. Everyone knows what they want, just get it in writing.

 

[Voran]

I absolutely agree. I had families who basically flogged their loved ones back to "life." They're bed bound and non communicative . At this point it's about the "loved one." They'll blame it on some religious thing or the fact that they're not ready to let go. They all say they wouldn't want to be in the same position and don't see the contradiction. It's so sad.
Make sure you all have your Durable Power of Attorneys done to list your wishes and make sure family knows. Everyone knows what they want, just get it in writing.

At that point it's just vicious selfish cruelty.

I refuse to live in a communal facility full stop. I like being able to piss off for a walk at 3am if I want to, and I will end the care worker who tells me I can't drink Red Bull and I have to eat 'healthy' food.

At least, I can't imagine a 90 year old me would be allowed to bring a crate of Red Bull to a home with me, or disappear for a walk at o dark thirty.

 

[Nickie]

What can I do to join and help? I'm from Ireland, but I feel strongly about this.

Look up hospice in your town. Volunteer if you can. Join Compassion and Choices. Advocate for the legality of Physician Assisted Suicide, if Ireland doesn't have it. Fill out your own Advanced Directives choices for yourself, give it to your Dr, your dentist, and your closest friends.

 

[Nickie]

At that point it's just vicious selfish cruelty.

I refuse to live in a communal facility full stop. I like being able to piss off for a walk at 3am if I want to, and I will end the care worker who tells me I can't drink Red Bull and I have to eat 'healthy' food.

At least, I can't imagine a 90 year old me would be allowed to bring a crate of Red Bull to a home with me, or disappear for a walk at o dark thirty.

A close freind of mine just put her house (over 30 years there) and is moving to an ILF soon. She's very gregarious and teaches resdients there to play ukulele and sing. She's in her late 60s, and wants to do it while she still feels good. She gets to take her dog. But she's moving out of 900 sq ft into 700 sq ft.

 

[Voran]

A close freind of mine just put her house (over 30 years there) and is moving to an ILF soon. She's very gregarious and teaches resdients there to play ukulele and sing. She's in her late 60s, and wants to do it while she still feels good. She gets to take her dog. But she's moving out of 900 sq ft into 700 sq ft.

Nope. All of my nope. Nope backed up with an 80 person orchestra and a towering high F from Sergey Kryzhnenko. Nope. Nope.

 

[Voran]

Look up hospice in your town. Volunteer if you can. Join Compassion and Choices. Advocate for the legality of Physician Assisted Suicide, if Ireland doesn't have it. Fill out your own Advanced Directives choices for yourself, give it to your Dr, your dentist, and your closest friends.

I'll join Compassion and Choices, I think. I'm not a people person. I don't tolerate people well even when I'm getting paid, let alone volunteering. I lost an ESL teaching job because I raged at work and told someone to put live eels up their rear.

 

[Nickie]

I'll join Compassion and Choices, I think. I'm not a people person. I don't tolerate people well even when I'm getting paid, let alone volunteering. I lost an ESL teaching job because I raged at work and told someone to put live eels up their rear.

I used to lose jobs for stuff like that. I have a little more patience with stupid people than I used to. Why? Cause I needed the money.

 

[ThomD]

Compassion and Choices is a non profit group that is trying to get legislation passed in all 50 states to allow Dr assisted suicide. I joined it. All people deserve to die with dignity.

We have that in Canada, and it moved really fast. We are now executing kids. Japan is also heavily promoting parricide. They realize they can't begin to pay for the care. It seems logical to some that it should be done by doctors, but it completely changes the face of the medical system as you rapidly push most of the truly compassionate people out of the system. If you look at just the projected cost of treating autistic children over the coming decades, you can see where this is headed.

 

[Voran]

On the flipside it seems so cruel to essentially torture people by keeping them alive with incurable conditions.