Season 615 - Who Is Most Guilty?

We should never trust the motivations of a boatman you never know what neferious tricks he might get up to... you might end up with pennies on your eyes.

In Greek mythology, the practice of placing coins over the eyes of the dead was believed to serve as payment to Charon, the ferryman of the Underworld. The coins, known as “Charon's obol,” were intended to ensure that the deceased could cross the river Styx and enter the realm of the dead.

Apparently however boats going to China are made for love.
Here is my third - THE LOVER - Although this one was not written with this week's theme in mind, I think it probably sums up the way of thought of the lover in our story. Only out for what he can get, not truly interested in the object of his lust.

It's about the quintessential lover in literature: "Hugh "Blazes" Boylan - a main character in James Joyce's novel "Ulysses".
I wrote it for an imagined musical version of Joyce's supposedly "unreadable" masterpiece... which I am currently re-reading.

I hope you enjoy:
Last and least guilty in my take of the story is the husband. I could easily speculate him to the top of the list but I just stuck with the facts of the story and believed that he did not want the wife along because she would have been in the way of whatever business he had to conduct and that's plausible. Maybe the line about the wife desperately wanting to go with him because otherwise she would cheat as if to cast the blame of her infidelity on him in this situation moved my eyes away from him. My husband related song is about a man who cheated on his wife and ruined his family - God May Forgive You But I Won't, a song I came to know through Iris DeMent, a singer with a truly unique voice and delivery.

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A very different thread from the usual this week, so here's a story based on the plot, not a song. I have tried to use American English, rather than UK English so I apologize for any mistakes, and any offense! All of the names are fictitious and not based on anyone living and particularly not on Ukulele Underground!

Julianne watched from a bedroom window as her husband's sedan, gray and shiny as his business suit, circled the island in the center of the graveled drive. Dull Derek, they called him back at home in England, but not to his face. There had once been a flicker of romance between them, enough for them to announce their engagement to her parents, thrilled that their daughter had found a respectable, even English, partner. She watched, puzzled, as he lifted the trunk and took an item to the tiny barn, which doubled as his workshop and meeting place for his friend, Pete, to share a coffee. She had often felt Pete's eyes look her up and down, perhaps a little too close for her liking. He and her husband had been friends since the time they'd called Pete's Pest Extermination, to deal with a squirrel nest in the attic. He was a heavily-built man, in a plaid jacket and smelt of chainsaw oil and tobacco.

"I am away on business tomorrow" Derek announced.

'Please take me with you!' begged Julianne. 'Last time you went away Pete came around and, well, I didn't feel that comfortable'. "Honey, we've known Pete for years" retorted Derek. If only it was Angelika, her friend, undressing her with her eyes instead. Perhaps she was more afraid of that. Angelika had been born plain Angela but had adopted her name, along with her Goth image, in her early 20s, along with the jet-black hair that framed her face.

The following day Derek slipped away in his gray sedan, the tires of his car rustling on the gravel, while the morning skies were still as gray as his car. Julianne slipped into a bathrobe and hurried to the barn in search of the mystery item. What could it be? Derek always forgot Thanksgiving, being English, and it was getting close to Christmas, yet it was years since they'd shared gifts. Money was tight, since Derek had been overlooked for promotion or a raise for years. She opened the blanket it was wrapped in to reveal - a ukulele! It was something they could ill afford, and clearly not meant for her. His previous attempt to get her to share his interest had been met with indifference.

Julianne rang her friend Angelika and exploded with anger. Another ukulele. He had 35, 36 now, if she was correct. This was the last straw.

"Hon, let's go for a coffee after art class" Angelika sympathized. They had met there 3 years before, and it was one of the few extravagances she had left. "You can tell me about it then." After several pleasant hours she had almost forgotten her husband's new 'toy', and when the two women hugged after coffee she felt a compulsion to kiss Angelika briefly on the lips, something she hadn't done before. Angelika appeared unprepared, her eyes wide, then in a moment their lips were pressed together, the two women's bodies were entwined in a lovers' embrace, something Julianne hadn't experienced for years.

After several passionate hours the two lovers were just leaving her friend's apartment, still locked in an embrace, when Pete drove past. Within minutes Julianne's phone bleeped. "I SAW YOU" the message read. Julianne rang Pete back, begging for time to raise the cash to pay him off, even offering a blank cheque. Pete was unmoved. "I want some of what your friend is getting" came the reply. 'Then you will be disappointed' Julianne signed off, only to get the sinister reply "I WILL WAIT FOR YOU BY THE BRIDGE".

Julianne ran to the ferry, as it was getting late, and begged to be offered free passage. "It's fifty cents, lady" 'But I have no money' "Then you will be disappointed".

Julianne ran back to her friend's apartment, who had just bought her coffee, so wasn't expecting to extend her charity to the fare home, too. "I have no change, Jules". She made her way to the bridge and saw Pete's pickup on the other side, headlights blazing.

There was no other choice. She slid down the bank and made her way to the old stepping stones, almost covered by the river, and had barely covered three steps when she slipped into the fast-flowing water.

Christmas was an even quieter affair that year. Derek's friend, Pete, was bitten by one of the creatures he'd been hired to despatch and developed a tetanus infection as he hadn't updated his tetanus shot. Before the year was out, he'd gone too.

After Julianne's funeral, Derek approached Angelika, with the small gift of a ukulele he'd intended to give her for Christmas, until the unfortunate events, thanking her for her friendship towards his wife.

I hear they will marry in the Spring, Derek in a gray morning suit, although Angelika insists on being allowed to wear black, of course.
This is absolutely brilliant, Robert ... the Assassin Riddle with a twist! (Not sure how well the ukulele fared in all this!)
MOVING DAY - Charlie Poole

My #5 choice was the poor old husband. While the story says, " The wife pleads with him to take her with him because she knows if he doesn’t she will be unfaithful to him. The husband absolutely refuses to take her because she will only be in the way of his important business," it doesn't say that she told him the reason she wanted to go with him. I can't imagine her saying, "If you don't take me with you I'll cheat on you," and who would want a spouse that you couldn't trust for one night anyway?
So the husband in my version of the story is blameless.
Here's a story about a husband, told by the wife, with no infidelity involved. I dug out a green pork pie hat that I seldom wear just for you, Joo.

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And now for number 4, The Husband (though the song would do also for The Assassin). Time to get dark and moody.

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Hi again Joo. I was going to do something else for my assassin song, and then we had the sad news this morning of the death of Shane MacGowan, so I wanted to do a Pogues song. I picked this one, for the line about murdered ghosts. It's a little tenuous, but I hope you'll forgive me. And, well, if you think it doesn't fit, that's okay, I'll just come back with another one!

I'm gonna use civil dispute logic. The ferryman likely works for a larger organization and is insured, so the likelihood of getting compensation is much higher than from any individual. Lawyers will therefore go after the ferryman. So here's my rough (instrumental thank god) attempt at Bridge Over Troubled Water.
Okay, my last one was somewhat tenuous, so I thought I'd better get my Lover song in quickly. It would be hard to argue that this doesn't fit because "Lover" is in the title three times and in the lyrics ninety one times.

Have we had this yet? I'm a bit surprised if not! I haven't seen it, but I have also not paid attention as much as I usually like to this week so maybe I'll see it when I catch up properly...
Hi again Joo. I was going to do something else for my assassin song, and then we had the sad news this morning of the death of Shane MacGowan, so I wanted to do a Pogues song. I picked this one, for the line about murdered ghosts. It's a little tenuous, but I hope you'll forgive me. And, well, if you think it doesn't fit, that's okay, I'll just come back with another one!

this is great, Edwin!!!
I have added it to the playlist! Thanks for bringing it. So happy to see you back. More please!
Hello again fellow Seasonistas!

A wet, cool morning here for me.
Hope everyone is well and enjoying the week so far.

I have mentioned that you can post CAT songs in between your suspects song, or after. (I "adjusted" the rule after Jim brought a delightful cat song after his first character :p).

So it is with a huge smile on my face that I present an original about Mr T the miniature ginger tiger, and featuring Clark @Oldscruggsfan making the fleas danced on his Yowling Tom soprano! Thanks for the cool outro melody, Clark! I love it!

Lyrics in YouTube description.
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All right- number three, the wife song. If you have been paying attention, y’all know how much I love Steve Earle. You also know I recently saw him play an amazing show in Petaluma, the first one I had seen since his son died, and the best performance I have ever seen him give (in 20 years of being a fan).
I want to walk you through the first few minutes on that show. Guitar tech finishes tuning the guitar and the octave mandolin, and Steve walks out on stage and takes a seat in the center to a thunderous applause. He adjusts the microphone and drops the first bit of wisdom for the evening.
“I am going to start with a song that ain’t mine, because Shane MacGowan is the greatest f%#king songwriter to ever live.”
He launches into “If I Should Fall From Grace With God” and the whole crowd is singing along at the top of their lungs. It was really great to see, and I might have teared up a bit knowing Mr. macGowan was in the hospital and not shockingly had finally met the fate of a life of excess and addiction…but he is one you want around forever, and those Pogues records were so special to me as a kid.
Well, Shane made his last trip to the shores where his fathers lay today. He is gone. Maybe it is that compounded with some hard core adulting the kid is being confronted with that has me so sad…but likely it is just that I love his songs so, because I tend to be that way.
Anyway- I played a Pogues song for you. RIP prodigal son.
And last- the husband song. It has always been funny to me how Melissa chooses music. Genre never seems to matter, and while most of what she loves goes well with a soaking tub and an herbal tea…she is full of surprises.
She absolutely LOVES The Supersuckers. They kinda got stuck in the early 90’s when everything was grunge and did not quite fit. They are loud, driving Rock and Roll and sing about the craziest stuff, but she got hooked early and plays them when she needs to sing her head off in the car.
Anyway- a lead sheet does not exist for this song, so I tried to play what I hear as the rhythm guitar part consistently without my normal prompt. I guess I did all right. This one has swears so it is not public…my students watch these 😂
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Here is my penultimate song and this one (like the next) was written especially for this week and tells part of our tale from the point of view of Hakeem, the Boatman. The final song will be the wife's retelling the entire tale. See you tomorrow... or maybe tonight...

Hope you enjoy:

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