ukulele jokes

[Ron]

Q: How many ukulele players does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None - they wouldn't fit in there.

 

[snowy_zoe]

young boy: "when I grow up I want to be a ukulele player"

mother: "oh come on, you can't have both"

 

[dnewton2]

young boy: "when I grow up I want to be a ukulele player"

mother: "oh come on, you can't have both"

That is awsome. I total agree with the mother.

 

[RevWill]

A fifteen year old kid gets an upright bass and starts to take lessons. After his first lesson, his dad asks him, "what did you learn today?" "I learned to play the A note." After his second lesson his dad asks again, and he responds "I learned to play the D note." After his third lesson his dad asks again and he responds, "I learned to play the E note." After the fourth lesson his dad asks, and the kid responds, "I don't need lessons anymore. I've got a gig with a bluegrass band."

 

[brickerenator]

What's the difference between a fiddle and a violin?


Who cares, neither one is an ukulele!

Posted the question as my facebook status, a violinist friend took the bait and wrote a whole paragraph explaining the differences!
LOL!

 

[trizzle333]

What is the diffrence between a Ukulele player, and a Savings bond?
-a savings bond will eventually mature and make money...

Bassukuguy

hahaha i think the key word here is mature.

 

[Monkeyswithladders]

I don't know any uke jokes, but if I got the link right, this is my favorite joke for guitarists: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8B4m8egqR6Q

 

[dentuke]

Guy walks into a bar and orders a scotch... Bartender gives him a drink and suddely a monkey wizzes on it..... The bartender apologises and tells him the monkey belongs to the Ukulele player...... Guy goes to the ukulele player and tells him " Hey.....you know..... your monkey wizzed in my scotch"

Ukulele player says "No....but if I post it on UU maybe Aldrene can do a live lesson on it and then I can play it for you!!!!!!"

 

[JCMcGee]

How to tell the time with a ukulele:

It's kinda quiet as it was filmed late at night, turn it up:

 

[Arr4fun]

That was Great!!!!

 

[euchre]

A fifteen year old kid gets an upright bass and starts to take lessons. After his first lesson, his dad asks him, "what did you learn today?" "I learned to play the A note." After his second lesson his dad asks again, and he responds "I learned to play the D note." After his third lesson his dad asks again and he responds, "I learned to play the E note." After the fourth lesson his dad asks, and the kid responds, "I don't need lessons anymore. I've got a gig with a bluegrass band."

Now THAT'S funny!

 

[Ron]

How to tell the time with a ukulele:

It's kinda quiet as it was filmed late at night, turn it up:

Once I got through your great accent ( I know - it's not you who has the accent, it's me ;-)) - that is legendary!

 

[nobby8126]

Q,What is the difference between a ukulele player and a walrus?

A, One has whiskers and smells of fish and the other one is a walrus.

ba dum tsch

 

[geoffsuke]

damn it, this is what you get when you wash a guitar with hot water!!!!!

 

[Chris Tarman]

A guy wakes up in a panic remembering that he left his vintage Martin ukulele in his car with the window rolled down. He runs out to his car in the dark to check, sure that it will be gone. There inside the car he sees his Martin and 6 more ukuleles.

 

[Chris Tarman]

Oops. I should have read further than the first page before I posted mine. I just saw it on the SECOND page! D'oh!