Found It !!
Today's Chuckle
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mikelz777
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Mike $
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A magician was working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. The audience was different each week so he did same tricks over and over.
The problem was, the captain's parrot saw all the shows and began to understand how the magician did every trick.
He started shouting in the middle of the show:
'Look, it's not the same hat. Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table. Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?'
The magician was furious but, as it was the captain's parrot, he could do nothing. Then one day the ship sank and the magician found himself floating on a piece of wood with the parrot. They glared at each other but said nothing.
Finally, after a week, the parrot said:
'OK, I give up. Where's the boat?
The problem was, the captain's parrot saw all the shows and began to understand how the magician did every trick.
He started shouting in the middle of the show:
'Look, it's not the same hat. Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table. Hey, why are all the cards the ace of spades?'
The magician was furious but, as it was the captain's parrot, he could do nothing. Then one day the ship sank and the magician found himself floating on a piece of wood with the parrot. They glared at each other but said nothing.
Finally, after a week, the parrot said:
'OK, I give up. Where's the boat?
From Sept 2023 Consumer Reports Magazine: ... just go aWAY!
Three Tenors
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Voran
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One of my chess player friends and I just got into the weirdest and silliest pissing contest where he blundered his queen on purpose to prove he didn't need one and then I also blundered my queen to prove I didn't need one. This isn't even chess at this point it's just two people being idiots 
Your post aroused my curiosity. I found his bio on Wikipedia. Interesting man.
Nelson Ned - Wikipedia
peanuts56
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Can't judge the book by it's cover.Your post aroused my curiosity. I found his bio on Wikipedia. Interesting man.
Nelson Ned - Wikipedia
en.wikipedia.org
I remember seeing him from time to time on Telemundo singing in Spanish. He really could sing.
mikelz777
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frets alot
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frets alot
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frets alot
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Three Tenors
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rustydusty
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Oh my God! It’s a cross between my two teenagers and our dog
peanuts56
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I was talking with an old trumpet playing friend recently. He mentioned an old friend of his who is a very fine drummer.
This particular guy studied privately with one of the local drummers in my area. This particular teacher was the best drummer I have ever played with. He was a bit of a jokester and was a bit zany. He was also an incredibly nice guy. Anyway, the student went in for his lesson and things went as they usually did. His teacher asked him what he wanted to do with himself as a musician. He said he wanted to join a band and play in nightclubs etc. This was many years ago and there were a lot of local joints where bands played.
The kid comes in the next week for his lesson and said teacher jumped all over him verbally while he was playing his lesson. Lights up a smelly cigar and starts blowing smoke at him while yelling and taunting him. The lesson ends and his teacher pats him on the back, you did great kid. The student is confused. All you did was yell at me and tell me I stunk etc. Teacher said, you want to play in nightclubs, you're going to run into people like this. You kept your cool and didn't respond. A very valuable lesson.
This particular guy studied privately with one of the local drummers in my area. This particular teacher was the best drummer I have ever played with. He was a bit of a jokester and was a bit zany. He was also an incredibly nice guy. Anyway, the student went in for his lesson and things went as they usually did. His teacher asked him what he wanted to do with himself as a musician. He said he wanted to join a band and play in nightclubs etc. This was many years ago and there were a lot of local joints where bands played.
The kid comes in the next week for his lesson and said teacher jumped all over him verbally while he was playing his lesson. Lights up a smelly cigar and starts blowing smoke at him while yelling and taunting him. The lesson ends and his teacher pats him on the back, you did great kid. The student is confused. All you did was yell at me and tell me I stunk etc. Teacher said, you want to play in nightclubs, you're going to run into people like this. You kept your cool and didn't respond. A very valuable lesson.
Oldscruggsfan
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frets alot
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Oldscruggsfan
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Once, decades ago, while traveling with my closest friend, I encountered that exact situation (far too late) in a cheap Motel 6 loo. When my buddy (outside the bathroom) followed my yelled order to call the front desk, the clerk’s appallingly unhelpful response was “I can get you a new roll in one hour”.Suspecting that he’d misquoted the clerk and was viewing my predicament as humorous, I yelled again through the closed door, “The cleaning staff will just have to assume we stole these two washcloths because they’re going straight to the motel lobby’s rubbish bin, wrapped in one of these two clean towels, which would have been your towel, by the way.”
He got the intended message and quickly responded by opening the door just wide enough to pass along two fresh rolls of toilet paper which (as I would later learn) had been stored neatly on a small shelf just outside the bathroom all along.
