It seems to be fairly well known that women have a harder time holding ukuleles. Boobs, while usually an asset, are a serious obstacle when it comes to ukes.
I am well endowed, and I just started playing the ukulele. My first couple weeks of playing have reduced me other to a hunchback, stooped over a uke resting in my lap, or some sort of greased pig wrestler, chasing the damn uke all over my body as it slipped, slid and slanted into a hundred different unplayable positions.
Just holding it: it slides down until it's resting under my rack, either way too low to play or with the strings actually facing the floor. Easily dropped.
Squashing/squeezing it under my elbow: This does result in a securely held uke, but it's one that pokes straight out from under my armpit as though it is a machine gun and I am holding the rest of the world at gunpoint. If I hold it parallel to my body, my elbow has nothing solid to press it against and it makes a dive for the floor.
Cradling it from below with said elbow: My arms are not long enough to do this without also holding it in place with my chin. Uncomfortable, to say the least.
Uke thong: I had to make one, since I am in a country where they are not sold and things can't be ordered from abroad. I put together a working model, had a brief moment of hope that it would work... and then realized that, while I was nowhere near as likely to drop it, its back rested against my bits and caused it to slant down and attempt to flip over. I hoisted it up so that it was on the opposite curve and would point upwards- and found that, once again, I'd be better off just tucking the damn thing under my chin.
Upside down uke thong: Tried hooking it from the top. Almost worked. Almost. Still way too squirrely, making it impossible to support it enough for quick chord changes. Plus I had to tighten the strap so much it was like I was wearing a choker with a life-size ukulele pendant.
I'm stranded in Russia, where I was lucky to find a ukulele and some strings. They do not sell ukulele thongs here. I have not found a luthier, let alone one that I would trust to install a strap button on my precious. I felt that I was out of options. I started to think that I was never going to be able to play without wrapping my entire body around the ukulele and holding it in place with an elbow, a wrist, and a leg. In desperation, I tried
Just running a strap around the whole damn thing. I took the hook off of my handmade uke thong and just ran it under the strings and around the body. Comfy, secure, perfect. I need a thinner strap so that it won't interfere with the strings as much, but it's magical. It's rock solid and placed just right, doesn't tilt, and doesn't seem to bother my neck. It may mute the uke a little, but certainly not enough to cause problems unless I was going to try and play for an audience in a noisy room. This being unlikely, I am now satisfied. When I return to America, a strap button is on the top of my list.
And that's that. I hope that my tribulations might help some other struggling members of the curvier sex.
I am well endowed, and I just started playing the ukulele. My first couple weeks of playing have reduced me other to a hunchback, stooped over a uke resting in my lap, or some sort of greased pig wrestler, chasing the damn uke all over my body as it slipped, slid and slanted into a hundred different unplayable positions.
Just holding it: it slides down until it's resting under my rack, either way too low to play or with the strings actually facing the floor. Easily dropped.
Squashing/squeezing it under my elbow: This does result in a securely held uke, but it's one that pokes straight out from under my armpit as though it is a machine gun and I am holding the rest of the world at gunpoint. If I hold it parallel to my body, my elbow has nothing solid to press it against and it makes a dive for the floor.
Cradling it from below with said elbow: My arms are not long enough to do this without also holding it in place with my chin. Uncomfortable, to say the least.
Uke thong: I had to make one, since I am in a country where they are not sold and things can't be ordered from abroad. I put together a working model, had a brief moment of hope that it would work... and then realized that, while I was nowhere near as likely to drop it, its back rested against my bits and caused it to slant down and attempt to flip over. I hoisted it up so that it was on the opposite curve and would point upwards- and found that, once again, I'd be better off just tucking the damn thing under my chin.
Upside down uke thong: Tried hooking it from the top. Almost worked. Almost. Still way too squirrely, making it impossible to support it enough for quick chord changes. Plus I had to tighten the strap so much it was like I was wearing a choker with a life-size ukulele pendant.
I'm stranded in Russia, where I was lucky to find a ukulele and some strings. They do not sell ukulele thongs here. I have not found a luthier, let alone one that I would trust to install a strap button on my precious. I felt that I was out of options. I started to think that I was never going to be able to play without wrapping my entire body around the ukulele and holding it in place with an elbow, a wrist, and a leg. In desperation, I tried
Just running a strap around the whole damn thing. I took the hook off of my handmade uke thong and just ran it under the strings and around the body. Comfy, secure, perfect. I need a thinner strap so that it won't interfere with the strings as much, but it's magical. It's rock solid and placed just right, doesn't tilt, and doesn't seem to bother my neck. It may mute the uke a little, but certainly not enough to cause problems unless I was going to try and play for an audience in a noisy room. This being unlikely, I am now satisfied. When I return to America, a strap button is on the top of my list.
And that's that. I hope that my tribulations might help some other struggling members of the curvier sex.